Wedding Wednesday- Final Thoughts on Gift- Giving

from www.amazon.co.uk/The-Monster-Factory

Alright, one of the other things I couldn't really talk about during the process of preparing for the wedding was gift giving! This, to me, is a very important part of any event, because I just genuinely love giving presents. I feel like it gives me an opportunity to show people how much we love/ appreciate them, so we spent a lot of time/ discussion on what would be a good gift to give. 

As a bridesmaid, you basically always get the same gift- the jewelry you wear for the wedding.

 

 

 I tried to get them jewelry that was really cool and special- I bought them from Jennifer Jones Jewelry on Etsy ( you can find her shop here- http://www.etsy.com/shop/JenniferJonesJewelry?ref=seller_info). The ones for our wedding were in all of our colors and had all sorts of neat vintage earrings on them. I felt kind of torn about them once I got them, because they were so my style and not the girls, necessarily, but I think they liked them. I had spent a long time deciding which bracelet for which girl, and at least my sister-in-law Elizabeth wanted to know why I picked hers for her, so that kind of curiosity was fun.

etsy.com

  

I would highly recommend Etsy to brides who are looking for cool original jewelry that perfectly matches the style of their wedding. We were going for a kind of light late 40's/ 50's feels for our bridal party, so I went with these big retro looking studs for their earrings. I found them at a wide variety of stores, almost all of whom were pleasant and easy to deal with. Every girl got different flowers for their ears, and I think they were a nice simple foil to the otherwise kind of busy get ups. Plus, I figured that the earrings might actually be wearable again, even if the bracelet wasn't.

My mom and I had decided that we would pay for the girls' hair, so that pretty much ate up the bridesmaid budgets, but the boys were getting such a fun gift that I wanted to get the girls something fun too! So I had the idea, thanks to think geek, to get them all weird cookie cutters (the original idea was to get them all ninjabread cookie cutters like the top picture!). I decided that since many of them are more functional adults than I am, I would try to mix in silly and sentimental cutters with ones that they may actually use. The only person who got all silly ones was Elizabeth, because she is 17 and therefore is at about the same maturity level as I am. The cookie cutters reminded me of many of the times that my MOH and I made cookies with our Nana.

I think cookie cutters work because who doesn't like making cookies? Even better ones that have some silliness and joy? It is one of my favorite things to do, and I weirdly have silly baking memories with a lot of my bridal party. Something like that also offers you the opportunity to give everyone equal but personalized gifts.

etsy.com

The last thing I gave the girls was a pez dispenser with a disney princess theme. Over the years, the boy and I had joked about an elaborate wedding at Franklin High School track with Celine Dion on a crane that was Disney Princess/ sin themed. I had a couple of throwbacks to that wedding planned, but the biggest one was that each of the girls got their pez dispenser (my brother had bought me the set about 5 years ago) and a little cupcake charm (also from Etsy) to attach to their bouquet. The cupcake charms were cute, but they were kind of a fail, because they fell apart all day long- mine even fell apart at the altar!

 

The boy had a much easier time choosing the gifts for his groomsmen (I want to point out here that we used the tissue paper as wrapping material... which I will be doing for the rest of my life). He and his brother (and their friends) had played with legos together since they were kids, and the legos have been making more and more of a comeback over the last year. My brother is also into legos, so really the only person who wasn't crazy into it was The Boy's oldest brother Johnny. I am pretty sure they had pulled him over to the dark side by the end of the wedding.

  

The legos were a pretty big hit, except for Pete who wanted us to get him a different set. He had helped me wrap them all, but he did such a good job keeping them all a secret. He is awesome!

  

For guys, there are less accessories you need to provide, but leave it to us to make it more complicated. We bought them all robot socks, which I think looked a little bit more like monsters than robots. We also got them their bow ties and suspenders, since the odds are they won't be getting much repeat usage out of them. 

 

Despite Jim's face in the picture, they mostly seemed pretty pumped about wearing the bow ties. I thought they looked pretty sharp and adorable, so I am glad I took a stand for the bow tie. 

The last group we wanted to really give something great to was our parents. It turns out there aren't many traditions or guidelines of what you give to your parents (much less stepparents) for your wedding so we tried to have a good time with it. But all of our parents had been ridiculously helpful, supportive, and enthusiastic en route to our wedding, so it was very important to me that we put some thought into their gifts.

 

Because we had two big Harry Potter fans on our hands, we gave both our Mom's Harry Potter wands! Well, technically MIL got a Molly Weasley wand and my Mom got a McGonagal wand. I think they liked them a lot. If you want to buy someone a wand I would highly recommend this store- http://www.etsy.com/people/SticksAndKicks. We also got The Boy's parents a family tree from Etsy, which I thought turned out really beautifully.

etsy.com

My mom was the only parent we instantly knew what we wanted to get her- she has wanted this kind of Hawaiian bangle for a long time, so I saved up to get her one for the wedding. We debated between this number and another one with flowers on it, but my Aunt Ann felt like she would like this one better. I also got a set of coral print for my mom's husband, who is big on the scuba diving. 

I had the hardest time shopping for my dad- I got him an embroidered tissue, and we got his wife a necklace charm of her dog Big, but we needed to do something else. We talked about getting them a nook kitchen table, or a hammock, but eventually we got them a gift card for a verizon store, because they both have ancient phones, and my Dad's was truly terrible. It was a more practical gift than I usually get, but once I thought of it I was pretty proud of the idea.

Ok, so now that I do this, I realize that a lot of this would probably not be that helpful for brides making plans. So, my advice for the gift-giving is to take your time with it. I am not sure it even makes some of those wedding checklists, but it is worth your time to start putting thoughts and money aside as you go. I think it is also great if you can connect the gifts to the larger goals of the wedding, because you usually give them on the night before- they help set the tone, so if you are going traditional, do traditional gifts! If you want a serious party feel, do shot glasses or something silly like that! These people, in theory, are the closest to you of anybody, so think about them and want they might want or need. I feel like it is an important part of of the wedding to show people you appreciate them, and honestly one of my regrets is that I didn't do that more, so I am glad we had this chance. It really is worth the effort, I promise!

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Edwardian vintage wedding dresses - a guide.

Dear Reader

The Edwardian period was just ten years from 1901 to 1910. But it is still popular today: just look at the international success of Downton Abbey. (The period after the death of Edward until the First World War is often included, too.)

Original Edwardian vintage wedding dress (with 1930s satin slip), £1250

Fashionable Edwardian brides aspired to the 'S' shape, which was created by whalebone corsetry. The corset design (called The Health Corset) although restrictive, was at least not as damaging to their health as corsets of the Victorian era. The waist circumference was gradually reduced by tighter lacing, until they reached their smallest size which - shockingly - could be as small as 16 inches.

I look for dresses with a reasonable waist size (not 16ins!) then I have a few clever techniques for increasing the size further. For example, adding lace from the same era. This can bring the waist to about 26 or 27ins - which of course is still very small fitting and not for everyone, but hopefully doesn’t require a corset!

Original Edwardian vintage wedding dress (with 1930s satin slip), £1250

And there are other features which may need modification: first, the front of the bodice is often loose-fitting, or 'pigeon chested’. Secondly, Edwardian wedding dresses often have high necks usually supported by tiny ‘bones'. These can be removed or adapted to give a softer neck shape.

I am not at all against changing vintage dress to make them work in a modern context,  as long as it's done sympathetically and the dress looks better for it! 

I am also a fan of Edwardian style headdresses. The fashion was for delicate circlets made from wax flowers, see my post here. I've definitely seen a trend amongst my clients for fresh flowers instead of diamante - which I think is a lovely change. I will always love a well made side-tiara but it’s nice that girls are rediscovering real flowers. And circlets are definitely a trend right now.

Original Edwardian vintage wedding dress (with 1930s satin slip), £1350

I'd also like to show you a Heavenly Vintage Bride from a few years ago. Her name is Millie, and she wore a beautiful late-Edwardian dress for her Beatrix Potter themed wedding. 

Millie’s dress is wonderful fine lace called ‘Tambour’ lace, which is embroidered cotton net. This was usually worked by hand using a frame and hook.

There's lots more lovely images from Millie's wedding on the LoveMyDress wedding blog (a great blog, if you haven't seen it before.) Check out Millie's feature, here.

I'm a huge fan of this style of lace - or any cotton lace, actually! And it’s so good for vintage collectors and wearers as it stays strong for many years. 

Many veils were also made of Tambour lace such as those shown here. I am in the process of having some lovely veils made to complement my dresses, using a special sewing machine which replicates this style of lace.

As soon as my new veils are perfect, I'll let you know: you'll see them here first! I've included some pictures of two wonderful original Edwardian dresses which are both available now. If, like me, you love the dresses from this period, then do check out these vintage Edwardian dresses here. 

Hope you've enjoyed this post - and see you soon!

Love 
Helena
Heavenly Vintage Brides

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Real Vintage Bride Alexandra, in glamorous 1940s wedding dress.

Dear Reader,
This week's vintage bride is Alexandra, whose wedding to Tim took place in the magnificent and secluded Brinkburn Priory, Northumberland. 

Alex chose an original 1940s wedding dress in ivory satin with a glamorous beaded and embellished neckline. She teamed it with an elegant long veil, pearl drop earrings and a froth of scented pastel flowers. And as you can seen, Alex makes a simply stunning bride...

Alex describes the process of finding her perfect vintage wedding dress…

"Choosing the dress was very easy. I wanted something that was classic, modest and original. When I went to see Helena at Heavenly Vintage Brides she was so lovely and gave us all a cup of tea and could tell us so much about every dress she had. It felt so personal and it was just right to go with her advice, rather than a brand/name in a boutique shop."

After the grandeur of the ceremony at the Priory, Alex and Tim chose to keep a simple, intimate feel to the marquee reception...

"We had a marquee venue overlooking the estuary in Alnmouth. In the evening the sea fret came in and it was just breathtaking." 

"We are lucky have very kind and talented friends and family. We made our own Save The Date cards. Al's Mum made the cake. Our friend Annahita made our Order of Service. Tim's brother did our disco. Another friend (a goldsmith) made our wedding rings. One of our bridesmaids made chutney for the after dinner cheese. Our friend Abigail provided some of the very excellent "Sheep's Nose" cider that she brews on her farm for the reception. The list goes on and we are very grateful!"

If you'd like to see more of Alex and Tim's wedding, you can find them on Darlingtonweddings.co.uk. 

Thanks Alex and Tim for sharing your lovely day. And thanks to Stan Seaton Photography. Pop back, dear reader, for more gorgeous vintage brides next week…

Love

Helena

Heavenly Vintage Brides

For more Real Vintage Brides, check out my website page here...

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Vintage Bride of the Week Susie - beautiful in 1940s wedding dress 'Bette'

Dear Reader,

I promised a special Bride of the Week, and here she is: Susie, wearing 1940s 'Bette' dress from my Heavenly Collection. 

Susie wears the dress beautifully, teaming it with a charming mini veil and woodland flowers...

And thanks, Susie for your kind words...!

"Thank you so much for your fantastic dress designing skills! I knew as soon as I found your website that the Bette dress was for me!

 You made the dress trying on process so relaxed and fun and gave such good advice, it made everything so easy. I didn't go to any other dress shops or designers as I knew I didn't need to! Lots of people complimented me on my dress on the day - your designs are so brilliant. Thank you so much."

After featuring the dress on a model at the start of this week, and then indulging in a little Bette Davis inspirational moment, it's lovely to return to what it's really all about: a radiant bride on a perfectly happy day.

Love

Helena

Heavenly Vintage Brides

If you like this post, please try

Bette Davis, glamorous inspiration for the Bette dress.

Photography with thanks to Seth Baines

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Wedding Wednesday- Final Thoughts on the Dress

 

Alright, I really am trying to get the wedding stuff done before I have forgotten it all. I figure next month is one month out, at which point all thank you cards and blogs should be done with. One thing that I thought I could talk about before it became ancient ancient history is my wedding dress. I didn't write about it too specifically beforehand, but now I can say whatever I want so there. 

We started shopping for dresses about a year before the wedding. My mom came to see me in California and we went all over the bay area to try dresses. We started noticing some trends early on. First, when you tell people you don't want to be sparkly, you run out of options a lot quicker. (side note: the fingers up are so my mom and I could talk about the dresses later)

 

Secondly, if you tell people you want something a little bit different, they hear ruffles. I tried so many things covered in ruffles on. It turns out, I am not much more ruffley than I am sparkley.

 

The other thing that became obvious quickly was just how expensive dresses could get. We went to a few fancier places, and things can really get out of hand. It was also a lot of information to process in one weekend and we started to get a little overwhelmed. People say you can get it in a few tries, but I think it depends a lot on where you shop and whether the person helping you has a good sense of what you want. The dress on the right, by Amsale, had swiss dots and I really loved it, but my mom wasn't feeling it as much.

 

Then we went to Priscilla of Boston, and I tried on a couple of their polka dot numbers with minimal success (back then I thought polka dots was really going to work, but it mostly didn't). I tried on this dress, Fern, and it, by far, got the biggest reaction from both my mom and I. It was very femme and soft without being obnoxious or saccharine.We had gone to Priscilla of Boston's partially for fun, because the dresses were a little expensive, so even though I think we could have bought this that day, the price scared us away.

 

After that, that weekend in July had minimal luck. 

 

But I did get to try on more ruffles! I thought a lot about it, but nothing felt like such an obvious answer that I was having a Randy Fenoli say yes to the dress moment. At the same time, I didn't have a huge desire to keep up the shopping, so I got antsy to just get something. 

 

Around November, it came out that Priscilla of Boston was being shut down to put more money and energy into David's Bridal, because they are both owned by the same company. I rushed to their big sample sales, thinking I would get Fern, but trying on the dress I couldn't help but notice just how well-loved that dress was. But the dresses were so cheap and sensible and fancy-looking, so I kept trying to find one that would work.  There was a lot of sending my mom cell phone pictures.

 

Eventually I found this one, which was super cheap and I figured was reasonably attractive. It was a sample for a dress Priscilla of Boston (Elaine) would never even get to make, so the dress looked good as new.  I debated back and forth whether or not to buy it, which was especially annoying because I couldn't bring another human being with me. All I had were the sales girls. So, I ended up buying it, sort of in panic that I knew this was my only chance to get a dress like that. I called it in from the East Coast and then picked it up after Thanksgiving. After I bought it, I was just antsy about whether I really wanted it or not, and started having a lot of regrets about it. I found myself thinking about the dress a LOT, which really seems like the first sign I had done something wrong. I was embarassed to show people and I just wasn't excited about it. It really is a very pretty dress, but it didn't have any fun to it at all.

I only was sure that I had made the wrong choice when I got my shoes for the wedding (from the fantastic Milk and Honey) and I was so much more excited about the shoes than I was about the dress. I took pictures to sell it online and decided I would shop a little in January. If I found something great, I would switch over, and if not, I could live with what I got.

 

I had really liked pictures of the Watters dress Lasara, and I saw online I could try it at a bridal store- Epiphany Bridal- in Carmel by the Bay. I waited until they were having a trunk sale, and the boy and I drove there for what became my sort of last chance to find it. And then, I did. 

 

I never had a weeping moment of ridiculousness at the store, but I tried this on and could tell it fulfilled both my requirements and the trends that had emerged out of a bunch of shopping- I liked dresses that flared at the waist (because I didn't want to have to think about the pooch at the wedding) with cool details. This looked pretty and floral from a distance, but when you got close it looked like a bunch of doodles. It was so cool!

 

So, with my first ever skyping and shopping experience, my Mom and I decided we were on the same page, that the cut worked, etc and we got the dress. Of course, because this had clearly become an arena from where to collect my crazy, we originally didn't get the bolero, because I liked the dress well enough without it, then eventually bought it separately. 

 

My mom finally got to see the dress in May when we went to the first fitting. No one tells you this, but it takes forever for the dress to come, and in that time, you kind of forget about it. At least, I did. So trying on the dress was so cool because I had forgotten how much I like it. It looked great, except that it was super huge, especially in the chesticles. 

 

The owner of Epiphany Bridal makes the veils and does the alterations herself, all for free. If you are anywhere near there, I would highly recommend her.

 

I think the dress came out great, minus being a home for bugs.  I would highly recommend not guilting yourself into a dress you don't love. Also, being honest with yourself about how you feel about your body, because I could have saved a lot of time if I told people I didn't want a fit and flare dress.

 

 

The other strange thing that you can get caught in is that this dress has to somehow be a summation of your entire being. It's not true. It's just a nice dress that you should really love and hopefully feel good in. And like anything else with wedding stuff, once you make a decision, if you can not think about it anymore, you made the right one. The bolero was a good choice and I think that it was beautiful and I kind of wish I had stuck with it the whole night.

 

I feel kind of sad the dress is put away, but I loved it and I felt pretty attractive in it. So it was all good. My advice- don't shop alone if you can help it, do your research, and leave guilt out of it. Don't get something just because it is cheap. Don't worry about the subtextual rhetoric inherent in your dress. You just want to look nice, and that means whatever it means to you. Yay wedding dress!

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