Wedding Wednesday- Eco-Friendly Wedding Guest Wear

In your early 20's, it still feels weird to go to friends' weddings. 

By your mid-20's, it is an established part of your summer routine. Most of us even get into those binds where we are invited to more than one in a weekend. 

By the end of your 20's, you are a pro, and you could probably fill your Saturdays watching people get hitched. 

Wedding Guesting is an art all its own, and it can become a big part of life (and your budget). We may spend most wedding talk on issues of planning, but most of us will go to more weddings as a guest than a participant (unless we are a real badass), so it might be worth it to figure out how to do it well (find that drunken shenanigan line- yes to dancing, no to anything you wouldn't want a professional photographer present for), how to do it with style, and even how to do it in an eco-friendly way. 

I love going to a wedding- how many events do you get to go to where you just get to be excited for someone else, eat cake, and get dressed up? I just like when good things happen to people, and weddings are usually (but not always) really good things. The weddings in our life have picked up from year to year, though this year we are in a lull, and we had to miss a few people we really love due to travel and pregnancy-related limitations (before this year, we always tried to make it, and I think we were only thwarted once due to a nasty case of viral exanthems- sorry Kate!). I would like to believe we have gotten pretty good at guesting, at least as good as we can while still being super awkward dorks. These are the key responsibilities as I see them: 

1. Have a Good Time- Someone spent a bunch of money trying to make this party a good time. So get on board whatever ship they are sailing. Dance even if the dj is not the greatest (or prioritizes taking selfies). Participate in the activity, even if it is dorky. Make small talk even if you truly are the worst at it. You are a collaborator in the good time, so get in there and have fun like it is your job. 

2. Get a Good Gift- A gift's value can come from a lot of things, but gifting is my love language, so I take it very seriously. MORE HERE. 

3. Don't Look a Hot Mess- Don't be the guest they are trying to crop out of pictures. This is a wedding; no camo shorts, nipples, or super fashion moments are needed (these are all things I have seen while a guest). The bride and groom probably indicated to you the level of formality and the general style of the wedding (often the colors too) in the invite. Don't try to dress like a bridesmaid, but you can try to get in the spirit of the event with your clothes. 

But here is the problem. If you are going to be a professional wedding guest, that adds up to a lot of travel, a lot of gifting, and a lot of merriment. It also means you are dressing up A LOT. 

You can green your gifting by seeking out the green items on their registry, giving them honeymoon money, or by doing simple substitutions by using the Made in America and Eco-Friendly Wedding Registry, 

It turns out you can turn your many fashion moments into productive and eco-friendly purchases as well. Let's go through it by formality. Not that I actually understand the different formality levels, because they are impossible, and we are a generation of ragamuffins. I'll split by gender too, but obviously you should ride the line or do whatever makes sense for you. Just gathering resources.

Formal (white tie) and Semi-Formal (black tie)

For Guys-  Rent a Tuxedo! If you think you have enough black tie events in your future, buying one might make sense. Even mainstream stores like Men's Wearhouse have their USA- made selections obviously marked. I saw a few on Nordstrom as well, but they are so expensive! How many times would you have to rent before it is cheaper to buy? Sharing/ renting makes sense to me for your average guy.

For Ladies- I have always hated that men can rent a tux and women are supposed to shell out so much money for a dress. It's not that way anymore! I am all about Rent the Runway, where you can rent formal dresses I know I could never afford. It gives you the chance to switch up your look, and it is more environmentally-friendly than all of us having some formal dresses just collecting dust in our closets. You can get dresses at every level of formality (starting as low as 30 bucks), but it makes the most sense when you are headed to a black tie wedding, because, really, when are you reusing that gown?

If your answer is "all the time, B," you are in luck. Certain designers of more formal dresses- Nicole Miller, Zac Posen, Jason Wu, Jennifer Kroll - have already pledged to make (at least some of) their dresses in the United States. Nordstrom has 46 options for made in America formal dresses. You can even try Amazon (just read the description before you buy. They love "or imported" in the descriptions). Anthropologie sells one line of Made in America dresses that would work for bridesmaids or guests. I tried to aim on the simple side, because you can always switch up the style around it, but that is my best tip- go classic in a simple color, and you might get more years of life out of the dress. 

Informal (Suit and Cocktail Dress)

For Guys- Most men (but not all, so self-assess don't sweat it if this isn't you) should probably own at least two suits: a grey or black one and a navy one. The nice thing for dudes is they can buy one or two really well-made suits, and then wear them forever. It's kind of this blog's dream for all people, regardless of their gender. Most suits aren't cheap, but a good one can last you so long that you really get your money's worth. 

I know Men's Wearhouse carries a brand Joseph Abboud that are sewn in the United States, so you can go pretty basic and still buy something ethical with minimal negative impact. Their dress pants are even on sale, so it can have minimal pocket impact as well. Nordstrom has a whole section of Made in America suits as well, though I cannot imagine ever being rich enough to spend that kind of money. 

I don't have much advice on men's fashion, but I do HIGHLY recommend the American List on the Continuous Lean. They have a massive list of American-made fashion and gear for men. We have had great luck with everything they have recommended. 

For Ladies- First, a lot of the answers for a great cocktail dress are the same- check out Rent the Runway, you might be surprised by their 1127 options. I think I will do this next time, because the dresses look so beautiful and at least at this moment, my body is always in flux, so purchasing something doesn't make a ton of sense. 

Lots of cocktail dresses are made domestically, so if you do want to buy, you can support slow fashion, the American worker, and shrinking the fossil fuel consumption that plagues uneccessary imports. Nordstrom has 400+ made in America options. Amazon has hundreds as well. You can also find beautiful cocktail dresses made by American designers like Nanette Lepore or (my favorite) Eva Franco. (you can also shop for both of their stuff on Anthropologie). You could also browse Modcloth's Made in America pages.  Lastly, try Shabby Apple- this American brand sells gorgeous dresses that would work perfectly for weddings and cocktail events. 

Casual (everything else)

For Guys- My husband would probably still wear a suit, but for most guys, a few button ups and some trusted dress pants are all you need to survive those less formal weddings. Use what you already have and invest in pieces that will last you. My advice? Look for some button ups on The American List from A Continuous Lean. It may cost more at first, but get something classic and it should last you longer. For neckties, I recommend used or something from The General Knot Co or The Hillside.

For Ladies- If you are in a sundress situation, your first good bet is to check your own closet or favorite consignment store. There are plenty of sundresses out in the world, so you are likely to find something great without looking far. If  you are feeling like you need something special, try checking out Shabby Apple, Modcloth, or Nordstrom. Try a new consignment store, borrow from friends, Thred Up, or even Rent the Runway. You can get something amazing for 30 bucks, for goodness sakes! 

Prioritize getting things used, and if not used, made in America. Stop buying things that are ok, and only shell out for dresses you love enough to keep wearing! Bonus points if you can dress it up or down to get more use out of it. I also think doing separates might get you more bang for your buck- you can use different combinations on those wedding-saturated summers. You have so many options, there is no reason to spend money on a dress that was unethically-made and wastes fossil fuels.

A few other Green Habits for weddings-

Turn down the plastic straw or stirrer. You can't stop the train from rolling, but you can get off. They will last a teensy bit longer.

Give an eco-friendly gift. Check the registry, but a few switches might make the whole thing way more environmentally-kind. Consider who you are shopping for, but this may be a good choice. Or buying a "giftless" gift, like movie tickets or a gift card for a museum, might be the perfect gift. Get your card from a foundation like the Arbor Day Foundation. Wrap it in something recycled.

Recycle your program. 

Good luck, guesties! If you need some inspiration for gifts, be sure to check out The Made in America and Eco-Friendly Wedding Registry. If you want more general shopping inspiration, try The Giant List of Shopping Lists. 

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An Earth-Friendly, American-Made Back to Grade School Shopping List

Alright, it is that "Back to School" time of year again, and honestly, I remember loving it as a kid. When else could I get my Lisa Frank Trapper Keeper with awesome Lisa Frank folders, none of which would get much use during the year (organization has never been my game). I also loved getting dressed up for the first day  of school- I mean, come on! Who can step to that freshness!? It's a sunflower hat and a jumpsuit for goodness sake!

On the other hand, businesses like to create a panic that your students NEEDS about 100 things. Not true! My Dad, over at Curmudgecation, wrote a blog from the teacher's perspective about what exactly needs bought for Back to School- his bottom line? Chill. You don't need as much as you think, and good communication with the teacher might surprise you about what can be helpful to send with your student to school. If you really want to help them out, a box of tissues (which you can get recycled!) might be a lot more help than buying yet another single glue stick to dry out by the end of the year.

So, I feel for all the youths getting ready to shop for all the new possibilities and wonderfulness of a school year. I also feel for parents- how do you tackle this time of year without spending a bunch of cash on stuff they won't use andcan't be recycled? Still, there are some good options out there, so you can put money into things that use less energy, can be recycled, and create less waste.

Think of this list less as a prescriptive "YOU MUST HAVE" and more as a "If you want this, look here at a more Earth-friendly version!" The very first step in greening your household and shopping is to reject acquiring things you don't want or need (no matter how many lists tell you it's necessary- if you find your student does need it, you can always buy it then!).

The trick to making sure your bubs have what they need but minimizing your environmental impact takes three steps:

Three Steps to an Earth-Friendly Schoolyear

1. Shop what you already have- Do this first so you can cross things off your list. Yes, it's time to tackle your giant collection of pens and pencils and see what still works. You may have more than you think (and retire all the ones that are just done). Same for notebooks- if only the first few pages are full, you can probably reuse it! Think about getting fun stickers or decorations to make them feel fresh.

2. Get Things Used- Children's clothes are hard to get Made in the US and environmentally friendly. Companies don't want to splurge on ethical labor for kids clothes, because parents generally know better than to shell much out for things that may not make it all that long.

 If your kids are still little, baby consignment stores may still carry clothes in their sizes. Goodwill also has a huge collection of clothes. Buy Nothing circulates kids clothes daily. You can probably still go big on some new stuff, but lessen the blow by trying to fill out their wardrobe with used clothes (and while you're at it, donate what your bub has grown out of- someone else can use that!).  Bigger Goodwills may have craft supplies, notebooks, shoes, or even backpacks your kids will love.  I feel like when we were kids, stigma surrounded doing this, but really, we all wore hand me downs.,

We as a generation of parents can do things differently to show our children the true value of things and to make a better world for them to inherit from us.

3. Buy Things that are Recycled, Recyclable, or Made in the US- You can find a lot of these in local shops (just check the labels!) or make a big Amazon purchase (I only use Amazon to show the product I am talking about- shop where you want to!). It limits your choices, but maybe not as much as you think, and teaching our kids to consider how what they have was made will help them be critical thinkers in the future! I started a list, but I am sure there is more, so let me know what I am forgetting!

paper goods

Decomposition books from Amazon

Notbooks- These Decomposition Books are absolutely genius (100% post-consumer paper, soy ink, even eco-friendly manufacturing in the US!), and they come in so many cool and fun designs that they should be a blast to choose with your student, no matter their age. Kittens in Space really speaks to my Lisa Frank heart, and it looks like you can color it in! 9 bucks is a little steep for a notebook, but it isn't ridiculous, and the price varies dependent on the design. Good job Michael Rogers.

New Leaf makes a basic composition book out of 95% post-consumer waste that is cheaper, though it is made in Taiwan. Still they are sturdy, and maybe a good option for you!

TOPS Second Nature notebooks are also around 4 dollars- they are made in the US, but have a lower percentage (only 40%) of post-consumer recycled content. Not perfect either, but it might fit your priorities, and it has solid reviews!

Mead even makes a recycled paper notebook now (this is the dream- all mainstream companies see the value in taking care of the Earth instead of taking advantage of it). Nothing too spectacular, but they were my favorite books growing up, and these are about 7 dollars a piece.

Onyx and Blue makes a notebook of bamboo paper, which stands as another option if you are looking for an all sustainable option.

Binder Paper- If you would rather go loose leaf (a good argument for that is you can always take the paper out at the end of the year and hopefully cut down on the binders you have to buy), and it can be better for high schoolers, especially in math classes. There are plenty of options for you too!

Ecology also has a 100/ 40% recycled loose leaf paper set.

Aurora from Amazon

Binders- My favorite binders are from Aurora- 100% recycled with 70% post-consumer waste content. I think they look cute, and I really like the fabric binding (way to avoid that plastic). Wilson Jones has an awesome set of binders that are made of recycled cardboard and plastic. The simple kraftpaper look is cool too. Hopefully they get more use than poor Lisa.

Post-its from Amazon

Post-it Notes- One of those things we all have at home, but now they have ones made of recycled paper and plant adhesive, so we can all have too many of these from now on (there are multi-colored pads too, for the younger post-it noters).

Paper folders- Ok, I am underwhelmed by these Oxford folders, and not only because of their lack of neon magical creatures. I think we can do better than 25% recycled material, so I am going to keep an eye out here (also, could decorating new school stuff day be a thing in people's houses? Does anyone out there do that?

Pencil Case- I don't think anyone really uses these, but maybe I am wrong! If you or a (slightly older) person you love prove me wrong, check out Etsy's selection "Pencil Case" with the United States filter pulled up 13000 options, so you can certainly find something American-made and awesome.

Planners- I love a planner. Love it. As an adult, I still relish the new one coming in the mail every August. I am not an organized person, but I like feeling like my time is somewhat managed and that my goals for the day are clearly set out. I don't understand how people live without them! Because planners make life more wonderful, lots of people make wonderful planners. Here are a few:

At a Glance on Amazon

At A Glance- YES!!! Isn't it awesome when you can get something almost anywhere AND have it be made in America? The At a Glance company even has an eco-friendly option that I love (why they don't JUST do it this way is beyond me). They have 100% post-consumer paper, 50% post-consumer covers, and 90% post-consumer wire. If you see these in stores, please send me a picture so I can be psyched.

Belle Rousseur- They are a planner-making staple on Etsy (over a thousand reviews!) and their planners are comparable to anything you would get anywhere else. They are also consistently very pretty. I like this rainbow leaf one.

House of Doolittle Planners- They make planners in lots of bright colors, weekly and monthly, out of 100% recycled materials, soy ink, and made in the USA. That beats any I bought at Staples when I was in high school, and these might even be cheaper. If you aren't sure how much your student will use their planner, start here!

Gallery Leather- I get a planner every year, and this is the one I got this year. Smart and well-organized (that's important). I do find the leather cover and sepia maps inside pretty funny, since most of my plans in the coming year will be poop and puke-related.

Green Chair Press- Another cool source of planners, including this pencil-covered one. I love the designs and they have a pretty wide selection.

Nude and Loitering Tees- They make upcycled planners. They have one of Ron Swanson. My brain just exploded with happiness. Treat Yo Self.

The Nifty Studio- Sells printable planners, so you could print it yourself at home on all recycled paper if you wanted!

Ninja and Ninj- More pretty designs. All made in Michigan.

SHP Planners- More pretty feminine options. You can also pick which month to start on, so no waste months.

Ruskerville sells a planner for the Hogwarts-headed mini-wizard in your midst. I love this idea, and they have all sorts of goods for geeky type A's at this store.

Printer Paper- Another one of those ones I wonder why I ever printed things on non-recycled paper. Here's the list (2 cents unnecessary)- Printworks (Made in the US, Food containers, 100%),  Aspen (100% post-consumer), Staples Recycled (100% post-consumer), and Hammermill Great White Recycled (100% Post-consumer paper).

other class supplies

Calculator- Someone will have to tell me if you can get graphing calculators made of recycled materials, but if you are looking for a simple option, this Sharp one is a good one.This Onyx and Green one is made of bamboo, is solar powered, and has recycled packaging.

Crazy Crayons from Amazon

Crayons- Crayolas don't use any recycled material as far as I can see, but their crayons (not everything) are still made in the US, so they beat all other mainstream brands. If you want some recycled crayons, try Crazy Crayons. Etsy has so many amazingly fun options for crayons reusing those crayon nubbins- cupcakes, legos, and hearts, among many others.

Dry-Erase Markers- Pilot Be Green's V Board line has dry erase markers made of 90% recycled materials AND they are refillable, so they are the big winner. Expo makes all of their markers in the US, so that is a pretty awesome mainstream choice.

Erasers- Westcott makes a fun tie-dye set out of 80% post-consumer waste.

Zebra Eco from Amazon

Highlighters- Zebra has a set of double-ended highlighters (I love that trick) made of 74% post-consumer material.Onyx and Office Depot have recycled lines as well.

Maps- This map of the US from House of Doolittle is printed with Soy Ink on recycled paper.

Markers- Crayola is awesomely USA-made, and this set of markers is also made with recycled plastic! Plus, you can clean them off the walls easily, so making the world a happier place as well. They make their crayons and watercolors in the US as well, though none of the materials are recycled.

Bottle 2 Pen from Amazon

Pens- Plenty of choices here! If you have to buy more pens, there must be a good recycled option for you. Never buy brand new plastic pens again.

My Pick (x 1000)- Pilot's Plastic Bottle Pens- I am obsessed with this Bottle to Pens idea. Even as a bougie pseudo environmentalist, I can see plastic water bottles are the absolute worst: they create more waste to sell you something you can get for free (not to mention gross companies like Nestle taking so much water from the suffering California reservoirs).

 Anyway, making products that specifically use this waste is an awesome idea, so I think these pens kick ass. Plus, I have a bunch and they are genuinely great pens that I would recommend irregardless. The 18 Pack is 20 bucks, so it seems a pretty good deal as well (though it doesn't seem to be on sale on Amazon anymore). Really, no reason not to use recycled pens ever. If we all made this switch, maybe companies could get the hint, and recycled plastic could become a regular part of products like these.

Pen Company of America makes their pens, you guessed it, in America. They also say the tubes are reusable, so I am wondering if you can ship them back. I will let you know when they write me back.

If you are a gel pen kind of person, and who can blame you, they just feel so good to write with, try these Onyx and Green gel pens.

Tree Smart from Amazon

Pencils- I did not know about these until I started researching this list, but recycled newspaper pencils are a thing and they are all kinds of awesome. You can get them in all sorts of cool patterns, and they sell all over the place on Etsy. Tree Smart sells a set of 24, where no trees were harmed in its making (all out of "yesterday's news)- they have a set of 12 also, and I think both are Made in the US. Fox and Wit on Etsy has pretty color-dipped options. Social Good Co (check out this awesome store!) also sells a beautiufl set with different colors on the bottoms, to give it a bit of pizzazz.

You can also find tons of tree free options in colored pencils (even more than last year, if you want to feel good about the direction of the universe). Ashleigh Nicole Arts sell my favorites, and I think the containers might be very elementary-school friendly. Tombow doesn't make their stuff in the US, but they make beautiful pencils out of recycled materials, so might be worth checking out. Farber Castell has an option for colored pencils, but honestly, it's pretty lame in comparison to these newspaper material pencils.

I hate mechanical pencils, but maybe they are your deal. If so, these Zebra pencils seem great. But seriously, why does anyone like mechanical pencils?

Pencil Sharpener- Simple, but it gets the job done, and is made out of mostly recycled plastic. Good for pencils and crayons.

Rulers- If you can get a wood version, this Woodrow one, 100% made in America, I would lean that way. If you have to get a plastic one, there are Westcott recycled version.

Westcott from Amazon

Scissors- Are you really out or are they hiding somewhere? I know in my Dad's house, they just loved to live in my room.  Westcott's Kleen Earth Line has a set made out of mostly recycled plastic.They also have 8 inch ones, but for whatever reason, they don't look that kid-friendly to me.  Fiskars has a (super high-rated) pair with 100% post-consumer handles.

Tape- Scotch is making efforts to make "Greener" tape with a 100% recycled core, recycled packaging, and plant-based tape. The larger packs could be awesome around Christmastime as well, and it again raises the question why anyone would use regular non-recycled tape.

White Out- They even have white out with recycled packaging now. I feel like this is a thing you are supposed to buy, but never use, but if that doesn't apply to you, you have a better choice now!

packing lunch

This may not be the first thing that comes to mind when you think of greening your school shopping, but changing your approach acan make a big difference! You could use a cool set of bento boxes (they even have glass and steel ones- check out Wean Green and Kids Konserve!) to store sandwiches and snacks, and no matter who you are packing lunch for, they can use them much longer.

Wean Green on Amazon

Wean Green- This company makes all sorts of glass Bento Boxes for lunches out of glass with great lids in bright fun colors. Even if one gets lost now and then, it will be better long term environmentally to do these over anything else. Kids Konserve also makes steel storage containers.

Kids Konserve- Not only do they make nice storage containers for lunches, they also make simple lunch sacks, made 100% out of recycled plastic bottles, that would be fine for a young student or one in high school. This option has simple, but universal appeal, and it seems totally within the ordinary. They also have patterned versions.

from A Little Lark

A Little Lark- A Little Lark sells simple cotton bags with all sorts of hilarious and/or adorable designs silkscreened onto them- check out the horses if you are the mom of that girl. Cool and different, but also really affordable.

Lunch Packer- Simple Bag. 100% Post-consumer content Plastic bottles. Perfect, but listed as currently unavailable, so I hope they are holding up.

Apple Park from Amazon

Apple  Park- These Apple Park lunch boxes are pretty much the cutest lunch boxes ever, and they are made of recycled plastic bottles. Perfect for an elementary aged student and their lunches!

from Olive Street Studio

Olive Street Studio- Olive Street Studio makes sandwich bags in super cute patterns. Perfect for sandwich lunches!

from Dabbawalla

Dabbawalla- This company makes lunchboxes that stand and are biodegradable. I am slightly suspicious, so if you have one, let me know what you think. Still, it's another bright, fun option.

from Bag it Conscious

Bag it Conscious- this Etsy store makes reusable sacks for lunch bags and sandwich bags- never one time use a ziplock again!

backpacks

Honestly, your best bet for a cool back pack that was made in America is on Etsy, so be sure to poke around there, but I will point you to some other options I like as well. 

For Little Ones

from Beatrix NY

Beatrix Packs- These little bags are for your little little ones, probably pre-school age. They are made of recycled plastic bottles and pure sweetness. Might be a great first backpack!

Apple Park- Also makes bags for the pre-school/kindergarten age group. Can't you see a kindergartner walking in to their first day with this on? They say each bag saves 24 water bottles from being in the land, which makes you wonder why all bags aren't made of recycled plastic bottles. Also, why can't grown-ups carry monkey back packs? I would enjoy that a whole lot.

GJRD Designs- This Etsy shop sells made to order quilted backpacks in the Vera Bradley vein. Not my deal, but I think it would look cute on the right little kid.

from Oliday

Oliday- Oliday is one of my favorite Etsy stores, and they have adorable kid backpacks for only 37 dollars! Would totally go for this in a few years.

Sew Blessed- Makes an adorable seersucker bag for little kids.

Cat Bird Creatures- They make backpacks for anyone who is awesome, though they look a little less substantial, so a smaller carrier might be better. And come on. Disgruntled Hedgehog Backpack? Sign me up. This gem of an etsy store is based out of Pennsylvania too!

For Teens and Teachers

from Medium Control

Medium Control- This etsy store sells messanger bags  and backback out of simple cotton with a pretty cool looking monogram on them. This all cotton recipe means there are no plastic fibers involved. They mostly come in kind of masculine cuts and colors, but I think they could work for a variety of things even after class is over.

from Givbag Backpacks

Givbag Backpacks- These really sharp backpacks from Givbag Backpacks are made by small seasonal staffs in the United States (they don't sell enough to keep a staff all year), but the best part about them is they are buy one give one, so you can help a kid not as fortunate as yours by buying your high schooler this bag. So cool!

Targus Spruce- This laptop backpack is made of recycled plastic bottles (and you already know that I think that's the business if you have to use plastic). I have carried a Targus laptop backpack for many years, and it has survived international trips and about a thousand security lines. I bet they can handle a high school.

from Intercon

Intericon- Mostly simple, but beautiful bags, and they are handmade in Hawaii! Most are between 70 and 100 dollars, and they also make super affordable lunch bags (you may just see them again on that list!). You were just thinking your bags needed to remind you of summer right? They look like high school/ college age bags to me. Also check Oliday. 

LL Bean Totes- A classic tote, still made in Maine. I love these bags.

getting snazzy for the first day

Toothbrushes- These Preserve toothbrushes are also made of recycled plastic, so you can start your day with Earth-friendly styles! They have kid-sized ones as well.

from City Threads on Amazon

Clothes- Oy, as I said before, this an area of slim pickings unless you are willing to shell out some major cash. Buy Used. Buy as much as you can used before you get anything new. This is what I found:

City Threads- This is my current favorite brand for kids. The cotton is soft and the clothes have stood up really well to my toddler. Bright and colorful without trying to be overly kiddish or trendy. Just nice basics to fill the gaps you can't fill from Goodwill or kids consignment stores.

American Apparel is a weird brand with a weird history, but they do manufacture within the United States and offer nice, simple basics for kids.

Green Label makes cute t-shirts with Environmental messages on them. Honestly, I am not granola enough for this (and if you are, you definitely don't need my advice), but maybe one of them will speak to you. I personally prefer something with a little more style like Honest Elements.

1791 is a great American brand, and they always have a few items for kids.

from Rustiq Charm

First Day of School Sign- Please, dear friend, I love you- you do not need a new sign for every year. Buy one small chalkboard or white board (which you can probably get used), and you are set for the rest of your children's school career.

Whooo! We made it through, and you can absolutely rock your back to school shopping this year. Want more shopping inspiration? Check out the Giant List of Shopping Lists!

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Wedding Wednesday- With These Rings...

The engagement ring is the first big purchase on the way to Marriedville, and no matter which partner does it, it makes for a very daunting buy- what if you pick something they don't like? How can you figure out what he or she would wear everyday of his or her life without giving away the surprise?

The ring's symbolic connection to marriage is a long tradition through multiple cultures- ancient Egyptians were buried wearing rings. That's how far back it goes. In 1477, Archduke Maximilian in Austria gave one of the first recorded diamond engagement rings to his lady Mary of Burgundy (the diamonds in this ring made an "M"- well-played, sir). The diamond supply shot up in the 1860's when they are found in South Africa, and DeBeers owned the vast majority of these mines and diamonds by the 1880's. Tiffany's market's their setting in the 90's, and by the early 20's, the diamond engagement ring is completely ubiquitous and expected. The tradition of the ring was co-opted into something very different, and it made some people a lot of money.

Some people point to wedding rings as particularly old-fashioned, marks of ownership and patriarchy. .Of course, lots of people don't follow this tradition exactly anymore, but even if you forego the engagement ring, shopping for rings is probably going to happen somewhere in the journey to the altar. The engagement ring has come under particular fire for good reason, but you can participate in a way that works for you with a little creativity.


So, we all know that diamonds and jewelry are one of the most environmentally friendly and highly ethical industries out there, right? That's why the term "Blood Diamond" exists- to reference how little blood is shed for diamonds? Isn't that what that movie is about? A lot of hugging? Snow White's dwarves?

Alright, so maybe not. Diamonds and jewelry are notoriously unethical and unsustainable. Not only are those giant honking engagement rings totally unwieldy (how do they not get caught on everything?), they also are epically wasteful. Conflict diamonds (or diamonds mined to fund insurgencies and violence) are shockingly common, and the rush to make money on these gemstones means a lot of diamonds come with an ugly history long before a ring hits a finger.

Debeers has a shocking monopoly on the industry, treats their people disgustingly, and definitely belongs at the table of Nestle's evil capitalist villians. I mean, these guys are actively and intentionally despicable, and if you are buying a new diamond without doing your research, you are most definitely giving them your money.

But you want to propose to your partner or you are shopping for wedding rings- what do you do?

You could just not wear a ring- marriage as ownership is certainly outdated, though I can say I still really like wearing rings with the Boy. I feel like it is a symbol of partnership, like a team jersey, but you can do this a million ways, so do what works for you.

You could go the tattoo route, but that is a dangerous game, my friend. Tattoos tempt fate something awful.

Or, you can buy rings, but go about it differently. A big price tag or a big rock doesn't necessarily mean big success in marriage, so you can go about it a different way. Just last week, Mila Kunis said that she and her husband bought their wedding rings on Etsy for 90 dollars each. I am willing to bet they got them at such a great price because the metal was recycled. Other celebrities are starting to boast engagement rings with alternative stones. I have a hunch non-diamond engagement rings are not only on trend, but on the rise.

The diamond ring set is not the only way to celebrate. Be creative and come up with something meaningful to you.

Want to buy rings in a more ethical and eco-friendly way? Stay out of Kay Jewelers, Jared's, all those mall places that are trying to sell you diamonds at the cheapest possible price. When you prioritize new, easy, and cheap as a consumer, you are inevitably sacrificing ethical making and eco-friendly shipping in the process. But every kiss does not begin with K. And most people could care less if you went to Jared's. Skip that nonsense.

You are way better off buying a more original ring with a smaller diamond (because really, that's a pain in the butt) but a less horrible history. That's an investment worth keeping forever.

So, if you want to buy a ring but steer clear of all the nastiness that comes with it, here are some choices.

1. Get Something Used/ Vintage/ Antique

from Brilliant Earth

If you are going to get a diamond, get a vintage/ antique/ or freaking pawn shop one.Just buy your diamonds used, whatever term you want to attach to it.

 DeBeers still owns a shocking percentage of all the diamonds in the world (so much so that they actually hoard them to create scarcity and protect themselves against their grossly mistreated miners), and the best way to get a diamond without giving them their money is to get them used. Bottom line.

These diamond rings have a reputation for lasting forever (thanks James Bond), but people and marriages don't last forever. So at this point, there are SO many rings already in the world, waiting for a spruce and a new finger to live on. There is so much vintage jewelry in the world. Some of it could be heirlooms in your family or you can find jewelry in most antique stores. Start your search at jewelry stores nearby that have antique or vintage options available, in conversations with your parents, even in the jewelry you might already have.

Buying used means that the jewelry hasn't traveled such a far distance, and you can feel confident that you aren't funding the horrors of the diamond industry by buying a new diamond. Metals can also be recycled, so you can find tons of recycled rings out there. It means something is getting re-used, which is always a more eco-friendly choice than others.

from spring thaw

If you can't find something just browsing stores or old jewelry boxes, Brilliant Earth (we will talk more about them later) has the most drool-worthy vintage rings ever.  Etsy also has a huge collection of antique rings to browse through (you can also narrow the search by putting in "solitaire antique ring" etc). This one from Spring Thaw is from the 1800's, and it could be perfect for someone (though they have some gorgeous solitaires as well). If I had it to do over again, I think I would direct The Boy to these rings, because they feel so special and they are so much more ethical. That being said, if you are patient enough to check local sources first, you might find something for an amazing price as well, and you are supporting your local economy.

2. Go for a Different Stone

Other stones come with other problems, so you still need to do some research, but in general, you will do better for price, ethics, and eco-friendliness if you steer toward something more original. Just skipping the diamond can make any choice a little bit better,

This is one of those eco-friendly choices that is also way better for your pocket and your life. If it doesn't really matter a lot to you (or the person you are proposing to- but be clear on that), you can save the money and put extra hundreds or even thousands of dollars into your honeymoon. That's a big deal, and you will have a ring that most likely doesn't look like anyone else's.

Moissanite

Moissanite was discovered in the 1860's and confused with diamonds, and this gemstone has only been in the jewelry market since 1998. It has that clear glassy look and hard surface of a diamond, but it can be made synthetically so it doesn't require any unethical mining. The patents for making moissanite expired in 2015, so now no single company can create a monopoly on it in the United States. This stone is one of your most ethical and eco-friendly choices, and it basically looks like diamonds. Very cool (and affordable) option and it's common enough that you can pick from 13,000 American-made options just on Etsy for this gemstone. Here are three-

from Laura Morgenson

I love a more minimalist piece of jewelry, because it goes with everything (and you are wearing that sucker for the rest of your life). Laura Morgenson sells minimalist engagement rings with moissanite that are only 150-250 dollars. So cheap, so brilliant.

from barzahav

On the total other end of the spectrum, sometimes your partner is just the kind of person who wants some serious wow factor. This ring, if made with diamonds, would be 10,000 dollars at least. With moissanite, you can get something like this from barzahav for 1,300. That's 8,700 dollars difference (twice the cost of the average honeymoon).

from lamore designs

Lastly, even though this gemstone is new, you could buy something with a definite vintage feel like the rings from lamore designs. So pretty and feminine.

Sapphire

If a used alternative gemstone ring was good enough for Princess Kate, what the heck are the rest of us doing? When you look at the sapphire rings out there, it is impossible not to feel awed and inspired. Here are a couple good ones, but GO BROWSE!

from Alea Marie Co

For your best impression of a British royal. I do love that Alea Marie Co makes their sapphires instead of mining them, and they look like the kind of ring a girl would dream of.

from Engaged with Diamonds

This antique ring from Engaged with Diamonds combines diamonds and sapphires in such a unique way. Never thought I'd like something like this, but the ring is winning me over big time.

from okimodo

My favorite of all the sapphires I have seen has to be this peach one from okimodo. I love everything about this ring.

from S Kimd Co

Ahhh! Maybe it is a tie with this S Kind Co engagement ring. I love the color, and it looks timeless and right now at the same time (try this teal one too or this one from Trudy's Gems),

Citrine

from Just Vintage 4 U

Citrine isn't a very common gemstone to go with, but this ring from Just vintage 4 U (horrible name) makes a strong argument for using something a little stranger. Really pretty, bright, and crazy affordable. For a couple who really cares less about material things.

Pearl

This always looks amazing to me, but I do think you should think twice before going this route. Diamond hardness is rated at a ten. Pearls can be as low as three, so they damage much more easily. You have to know the delicacy and lifestyle of the wearer before taking this leap.

from Lux Crown

Lux Crown is a great store for both vintage and gemstone rings. I love so many of their rings, including this beauty. Their pearl rings are only 250 dollars, and they are all absolutely beautiful.They have some beautiful opal, aquamarine, and amethyst numbers as well.

from Belmar Jewelers

This vintage pearl and diamond ring from Belmar Jewelers looks completely timeless and memorable to me. This one from DeKara's Diamonds has a similar look.

Amethyst

from Lux Crown

This ring from Lux Crown really shows off the purple color- it's a high impact ring for 250 dollars.

Emerald 

Emeralds also have a little bit of a mixed reputation for something worn daily because they can crack. On the other hand, that emerald green is classic, timeless, and incredibly memorable. They are pretty popular right now, and for good reason. You should get extra insurance on it if you go this route.

from Valerie K Studio

Valerie K Studio combines a straight lined, almost preppy stone with an organic vine band. I wouldn't expect it to work, but it really does. I don't actually remember people's engagement rings often, but I sure would remember this.

from Rare Earth

Holy Moly, this ring is amazing. Would be classy and unique forever, and every gemstone and diamond is conflict-free. I also love that Rare Earth will make a setting for a stone you already have, so if you have an heirloom ring with a great stone that otherwise isn't quite the style you want, you could take an old gem and turn it into something as gorgeous as this.

Diamond Substitutes

from Tiger Gemstones

Diamond "Simulants" may have a stigma, but guess what? No one can tell the difference, you save a bunch of money (go on a trip instead), and you can feel confident that no one lost their life procuring your diamond. Tiger Gemstones specializes in these kind of rings, and they might be good to partner with a diamond engagement ring if you have a particular idea or don't want to track down antique diamond rings twice.

I also love these rings from Life Spirals, which basically sells vintage fake diamonds. It's a good reminder that diamonds have never been an absolute must (we just put that pressure on ourselves.

This is, of course, just the tip of the iceberg (rubies, aquamarine, opal, etc) so if you have a gemstone in mind, start searching on Etsy to see what is out there! Avoiding diamonds will save you so much money while getting you incredible bang for your buck. At the same time, you are making one of the greenest choices you can as a couple, so you can feel so good about the choice. 

3. Try Brilliant Earth

Brilliant Earth began as a response to the extreme abuse in the diamond industry, and their mission is to make the jewelry industry more transparent, sustainable, and ethical. They use responsible mining practices and don't use child labor (oh yeah, that's a thing in the diamond industry too- nice, DeBeers). They also donate 5% of their profits back to communities that had been ravaged by the diamond industry. This includes restoring lands for agricultural use after the mining destroyed usable land.

As a side note, Brilliant Earth's rings are gorgeous. My favorites are the vintage, but there are so many beautiful things. Some feature non-diamond stones as well, so you can save money and have a more original ring if that is your style. Be sure to browse around the website and see what you find. You can also create your own diamond ring, which I think many people would see as a very sweet gesture.

Lastly, they do have wedding bands as well, so check there before you buy something else. These rings aren't going to be your most cost-effective choice (hello, check Etsy, people!) but you can feel like the ring you are purchasing is at least doing a little good in the world instead of quite a bit of evil.

4, If you haven't yet, fall in love with Etsy

Etsy has about 20,000 options for American-made or antique rings, and I swear I looked through half of that. They are fantastic. You can purchase your rings from the person who made it. If we could do it again, we would be wearing Etsy rings.You can support an American artisan, get rings made from recycled metal, potentially save a lot of money, and wear something no one else in the world has. Plus, you would feel as cool as Mila Kunis, so that is nice. There are so many to go through, and I honestly don't think I can do it justice, but I will just point to a (BIG) handful of my favorites. If you are buying rings, engagement or marriage or anniversary or just to keep your finger warm, you need to browse through here.

For an Engagement Ring- 

from S Kind Co

S Kind Co is my favorite find for engagement rings on Etsy. These rings perfectly ride the line between modern and traditional, feminine and simple. And they are crazy eco-friendly, but no one would guess unless you wanted to tell them. The company uses recycled settings, metals, and gems, and where they fill in with something new, they use moissanite. By re-pairing the old cuts with recycled settings, things look modern while being loaded with history. They also have a great mix of recycled diamonds and moissanite gems, so you can go with the eco-friendly option that works for you. Someone buy this one, because it is the prettiest thing ever.

from Engaged with Diamonds

Engaged with Diamonds is based out of San Francisco, and they have some of the most original and just cool rings I have ever seen. This ring reminds me of a string knotted around a finger, and I just love it.

from Estate Diamond Jewelry

Estate Diamond Jewelry sells some of the most beautiful rings you have ever seen in your life. They are also crazy expensive. I only found a couple under 10,000 dollars (this one is 5,800), so I think this is way out of most of our shopping ranges. On the other hand, if you are a fancypants looking to be eco-friendly, these antique and estate diamonds will be right up your beautiful alley. Need to look at more super snazzy rings that cost more than your car? Check out Antique Jewelry NYC.

from Ferguson's Fine Jewelry

Ferguson's Fine Jewelry sells all sorts of vintage engagement rings, wedding bands, and diamonds from earlier eras, Victorian, Edwardian, Art Deco, and Mid-Century. Lots look surprisingly modern, and you can find ones with alternate gemstones as well. Most are very simple and low-priced as well.

from Art Deco Diamonds

Art Deco Diamonds has one of the largest collections of rings I have seen on Etsy. They have lots of vintage and antique rings, and so many look almost like a traditional contemporary ring, but a little more detailed and a little more special. This is a good one to look at if your partner likes that deco style. For similarly unique rings, check Alistir Wood Tait- they are based out of the UK, so not perfect, but they curate some gorgeous antique rings (I especially love some of their other gemstones)!

from Wilson Brothers

If you are buying rings online, you probably want someone well-vetted. Wilson Brothers has over 2000 rings and over 2000 positive reviews already. With that much, you know you will see some variety so you have lots to choose from.

from Janish Jewels

Janish Jewels out of New York City sells rings with all kinds of alternative gems and conflict-free raw diamonds for rings unlike anything I have ever seen before. The lines are organic and unique, and I want to know the cool ladies who wear engagement rings like these. So different and so beautiful, but it definitely takes some originality to go this route.

from Shop Clementine

I can't finish this section without pointing to one more amazing shop- Shop Clementine. This jeweler, based out of Massachusets makes rings cooler than everything I own combined. Most have a minimalist aesthetic, but a slightly quirky one, and I love the subtlety of even the engagement rings- not everyone has to try to be like J Lo (that lady has knows gargantuan rings... also, divorce). You can also find lots of beautiful alternative gems. They use recycled metal, conflict-free stones, and they do wedding bands as well.

For Wedding Rings-

from Natural Ezanica

If you like wearing your nature-loving heart on your finger (or you just love the look of wood over metal, these rings from Natural Ezanica will be unique and perfect. They make me think of a minimalist wedding in Big Sur or a Hawaiian beach, Plus, the rose gold and other metals is recycled! This store has 600+ positive reviews as well, and they seem to be especially popular for grooms (it makes sense- they do have a masculine look).

from Brightsmith

Brightsmith from Austin, Texas sells woodgrain sets. But totally different from the last store- metal with an organic texture and aesthetic. I especially love the combination of thicker bark rings and the more delicate twig bands This store has more minimalist hammered bands, and they also have a whole "weddings on a budget" folder. The overall feel is rustic minimalist.

from Peaces of Indigo

Peaces of Indigo, from Nashivlle, sells some of my favorite wedding bands ever- these rings are made out of antique silver she has reworked and engraved to make patterned wedding bands. Not as minimal as most of what is popular now, but I love the bohemian feel, like you made the rings yourself out of your Grandma's silver. Just incredibly cool, and she has about 1600 glowing reviews, so you know they look even better in person.

from Mountain Ursus Designs

Want to outdo Mila Kunis? These rings from Mountain Ursus Designs are 27 dollars and made of all recycled copper. I kind of imagine Ron Swanson made them, because they are so straightforward, but copper is such a pretty color. No environmental impact beyond the shipping, and not all that much impact on your wallet either.

from Lilly Emme Jewelry

Looking for something sleek and traditional? Lilly Emme Jewelry from Seattle has wedding sets that match and look both pretty and simple, but they still seem special and kind of sweet. They are also made of recycled metals, so that is awesome.

from Aide Memoir

Aide Memoir sells rings made of 100% recycled metal and conflict-free gemstones, but you would never guess they were any different from any other wedding bands on the market. Minimal and pretty, plus the company sends money off to groups fighting for ethical mining. I love the alternatives they have for both genders, and nothing feels overly feminine or butch. They are also one of the only stores I have seen selling sets specifically for same sex couples, which seems like it should be way more common. Effortless and classic. Sweet Olive Jewelry also sells thin and minimal wedding rings for women. They are made using recycled materials, and they look absolutely beautiful. Nothing fussy and under a hundred dollars, but it might just be perfect.

from VK Eco Jewelry

VK Eco Jewelry makes their jewelry using eco-friendly methods and recycled materials out of Portland, Oregon. Most of their designs are simple and unfussy, but also have a really appealing softness.

Want a recycled ring but didn't find quite what you are looking for? I have a few more places for you to look- Sea Babe Jewelry, 2 Trick Pony, Tiny Sparkle Studio, Metal Wendler, okomido (also great for engagement rings), Torchfire Studio, Silver Smack, Lolide, esdesigns, The Sly Fox (love this store), Melissa Tyson Designs, and metaliscious.

5. Try Another Eco-Friendly Jeweler

Forget "alternative." Jewelers that take a more responsible approach to their work are so easy to find. And start local- ou may be surprised. Maybe because this is a field dominated by artists, you can find tons of creative and thoughtful solutions to the problems jewelry creates for the environment. You might find something right in yoru neighborhood. Maybe you won't be able to afford it, but you just might be surprised. It doesn't hurt to look. A few options I found (very quickly no less, though there is definitely a wide range of price points here); Ken and Dana Design, Monique Pean, Bashford Jewelry (more affordable), Leber Jewelry's Earthwise Collection, DoAmore Rings (part of a clean water initiative),

This is a lot right? And the waking of a certain toddler is cutting me off, so I will add even more later. Stay out of mall jewelry stores or places that aren't outspoken about the ethics of their diamonds' mining. It's a big deal, and you don't need that blood on your hands when you are walking down the aisle. Plus, you can save money, save fossil fuels, even reuse metal or gems this way- so your bands for life can do a whole lot of good!

And check out previous Wedding Wednesdays for more ways to make your wedding better for the world around you!

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