9 Things for the Last 9 Days- Starting the Fall with the Bub

 1. Baby Handprint Ornaments-  We did these with the Bub too, and what I like most about them is that when I look at them, I can still hear the screams. I kid, sort of. Wow, my children hate doing them, but I didn't much enjoy labor, so it seems fair. They both produce something cute, and I like that these are basically the first of many sentimental art projects they will hate doing. Sorry boys, I am your mother and you are stuck with me.

2. Show me your Mumu- I am in a wedding later this year and have been on the hunt for a flattering dress, Made in America, of a certain length and color. Easy right? Well, I have found a bunch that fit the bill thanks to this company Show me your Mumu that still manufactures in the USA and has dresses so flattering and chic your bridesmaids might actually love them. I wish they had been around when we got married,

 3. This Year's Walk to End Alzheimer's- I didn't think I would be able to go, so I was especially glad to be there. I was also happy to do the walk with my in-laws, because the tradition is really about my husband's family, so it made it more special to share in the chaos with them. I also thought this year was in the nicest spot so far in Seattle, and it felt like it had a really enthusiastic and positive energy (last year didn't, but it was a much wetter and greyer day).

4. Breastfeeding in Seattle Center Surrounded by People- Just add it to my list of weird places where the boobs have been out. I don't think people cared, and I love my covered goods breastfeeding cover for being a nice scarf to just wear as well as a cover for everything. I can already see how people with 2 children lose steam for getting out in the world, but I want the new baby to keep getting out there too, so tools like these really help.

5. Fall- I could not be happier that fall is here. For me, this season feels like a fresh start, everything smells good, and the world is covered in color. I get to wear layers and put decorations up, so I can't complain about life right now. Seotember October, and November are the best. Excited for The Baby Bear's first fall, because his bright eyes just drink everything in.

6. Wall-E- You hear a lot about little ones liking Finding Nemo or Cars, but The Bub has just been captivated by Wall-E. You know that Pixar rocks what they do when a two year old is totally enamored from the first minute. I love that movie in general, but I love it even more now.

7. Green Onion and Recycled Plastic- Who would have guessed we would have a kid so granola that he likes sitting, eating his garden green onions, on that all-recycled plastic bench. Different than the life I thought my kids would have, but I like when things are happy and slow like this. 

8. Our First Homemade Pesto- The Boy made it with his mom, and it makes my life. I feel excited and proud that at the end of this summer, we weren't totally defeated by the "growing your own food" garden experiment. We certainly aren't self-sufficient, but it is still cool to make applesauce, pesto, chimichurri and more with the plants from our own yard. If nothing else, everyone should have a herb garden. It has saved us so much money!

9. Barb- Yes, we are finally watching Stranger Things. Yes, it is as good as everyone says. We are only halfway, but the third episodes is one of the best episodes of any television show I have seen ever. People talk about the show in terms of Spielberg and nostalgia, but you could also bring iconicity into the conversation. How do you choose details that are striking enough that they stick immediately? Because that is what is happening here, and the icon of my heart is Barb. In a world full of Nancies, be a Barb.

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The Three Most Disturbing Costumes I Could Find on Pinterest

I love seeing all the crazy costumes that go up on Pinterest this time of year, but there are always creepy ones. These are some of the creepiest ones I have noticed in 2014:

from internetsiao.com

1. This family. What the heck!? I know Minecraft is getting super popular, but it really does creep me out. Also, how is the one riding the pig standing? Or is he sitting? Also, what if they are chased by bandits?

from  hellosociety.com

from coscouture.com

2. Random, Unidentifiable, Made-Up faces. The one of the top gives me nightmares (wow, it looks amazing and horrible all at once!), and then I can ponder what the hell is going on in the bottom picture. Is she some sort of lion? A cat who enjoys wigs? A fairy turning into a lion?

from blogs.babble.com

3. Children in Age Inappropriate Wear-I feel bad for this kid, because he looks old enough to e pumped for a costume he actually understands. This is funny, but I feel like he has sad eyes. Also, it is just creepy when this is so age inappropriate.

from funnystuffforyourday.blogspot.ca

Honorable Mention: This guy. I find jokes like these genuinely creepy. The longer I look at this picture, the more I just want to punch him in the face. Please, just don't be this guy. You aren't clever, and nobody is impressed. 

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What does it mean to be a Steward? Green Living, Christianity, and Taking Care of God's Creation

 

Marc Chagall, Adam and Eve, St Stephen Mainz Germany
from flickr.com

 "Owe no one anything, except to love each other, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law. For the commandments, “You shall not commit adultery, You shall not murder, You shall not steal, You shall not covet,” and any other commandment, are summed up in this word: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” Love does no wrong to a neighbor; therefore love is the fulfilling of the law."-Romans 13: 8-10

"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change" -James 1:17

I have been a Christian since I was a child, and my very basic understanding of Jesus Christ and Christianity is this (pardon the crass paraphrase here, I am no theologian). He showed up and told people,  "You are letting these accumulations of rules and religious baggage pull you away from God. The two greatest rules are to love God and love each other." Basically everything else in the red letters, to my mind, expands on this, and he tells story after story about these themes.

In the prodigal son, we see the unconditional love of the father at play, but we can also learn from the "good" son, who stays and works, then feels frustrated and jealous that his misbehaving sibling receives such love. We can learn that being close to God is a reward in itself, and just because you do everything "right" doesn't mean God loves you more. It's the other side of grace.

In the good Samaritan, we watch a bunch of people who are supposedly "right" with God turn their back on an undesirable person who needs their help. Like so many of the examples that Jesus sets in his actions, this story shows the value and love in helping someone who doesn't agree with you or who is even your enemy. Your taking care of others pleases God.

I think a lot about the seemingly simple charge to love others and to love God, and what this action entails. These two instructions dominate and organize my faith (and deeply inform my being a liberal and a feminist as well).  If you really accept God as creator of everything, then loving others, no matter what their religion or race or whatever becomes (in my one opinion) an absolute necessity, because they are just like that prodigal son- maybe not on the same track to Him as you are, but equally loved by Him (and it's not your business or your right to judge them beyond that). I know that loving someone means communicating (it's why we pray and meditate, right?), it means to care, it means to "protect, trust, hope, and persevere." We show these people love because God created them, and just like we wouldn't rip up a handmade gift (I mean, no one rips up a scarf from their grandma or a card from a child), we should treasure other humans as specially made by Him.

What could we as Christians do better to love God and show him we are grateful for his creation? One of the clearest (but most difficult) answers to this question is to be better stewards. When God first charged Adam and Eve to take care of the world he made them, the task was relatively straightforward- take care of the Earth and the animals on it. In Genesis, we read "“Then God said, Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.” So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground.”

He gave us responsibility for everything on the Earth, to build up his creation and to take care of it. Everything was right in front of their eyes, so if there was a problem, they could see it. Thousands of years later, capitalism has pulled us far away from these things- we (mostly) don't grow or hunt our own food, we don't take care of our own waste,  and we don't make about 99% of what we use (is anyone reading this actually wearing something they made? I am wearing a sweater from The Gap and eating Goldfish, so I know I fail this test.

Green practices, tree-hugging, etc. has become another political issue where I believe in some cases, Chist-claiming politicians are actually fighting against our charge as Christians. The debate about global warming rages on, but no matter what your opinion, can you really say that you are honoring God's creation in how you are living your life? Why does it even matter when it is CLEAR we are not doing what we should as human beings and as a nation to take care of the world around us? Are you encouraging kind treatment of animals, of plants, of the Earth? I know I could do much better at this. If you aren't making it yourself, I believe STRONGLY it is your responsibility as a Christian to vote with your money, to show companies that your won't give them money for treating the earth badly. To me, this would include buying ethically treated animals, shopping at places that treat their workers right, and encouraging Earth-friendly modes of eliminating waste in your neighborhood.

The next response to this line of thinking is "Holy crap, do you know how hard it would be to do all of this?" I totally agree! This is a huge challenge, not to mention how expensive it is in some cases (buying ethical meat is so much more costly for example).

Tough noogies. I think stewardship should be hard. Much like taking care of your home, your body, or the things that are immediate to you, taking care of the world should be continuing labor and it should cost you something. It never becomes something you don't have to try at, but the longer you let it go, the harder it becomes to pull things back together. God made us this way for a reason. Capitalism likes to promise easy, speedy, and cheap, but this lie they sell us over and over again isn' doing any of us any good individually or on a larger scale (see- self-checkout. It's not that much faster, they are literally putting you to work, and you are costing someone their job). The sooner we give up this idea, the better we can serve God through the way we live our daily lives.

So I know we as a family are resolving to become better stewards for the Earth. Not to be perfect, but to try to shop ethically. We are lucky that Seattle has composting and recycling as part of their garbage service, and I have to say, I am blown away by how little actual garbage you have once you compost (it is smelly though, if we are keeping it honest- I don't remember reading about stinkiness in the Bible except for Ehud in Judges, and that is unrelated). The true owner of your home and Earth is God, you are just keeping it right now. He gave us his best, so I am striving to better give him my best at this as well. I think there are some simple steps you could take if you wanted to start small:

1. Canvas grocery bags! Not only are they way way better for the environment, they also hold more stuff. Sure, you get to have the moment where you realize you left your bag in the car at least once a month, but if you are a normal person, the routine eventually takes over (I still fail at this).
2. Walk places or carpool. I know the possibility to do this varies a lot depending where you live, but if you can (meaning to me, less than 2 miles of a safe walk), then why not? It's better for you too! Also, please don't ride your bike. I hate bike riders. They are my mortal enemies (but really, if you can trade a ride in the car for a quick bike ride, I support that).
3. Stop using straws! I think this may have set this whole thing off for me. Do you know how much waste the average American makes just from all those one time use plastic straws? Really people, if you aren't a toddler, you can probably stand to skip the plastic lid and straw at a restaurant. Keep ones in your car like you keep napkins, and when you go through fast food or starbucks, turn down the ones they offer.
4. Use more ethical eggs- Unless you are supergranola Mindy, you probably buy your eggs. Eggs and their farmers have gotten on board with cage-free or organic fed practices more quickly, and in most cases, it is one of the smaller/ more affordable changes you can make.
5. Meatless Mondays (and Tuesdays)- A good way to cut down on meat cost so you can buy whatever you will eat is to have a few more meals with eggs or nuts as the proteins. It can really help, and you can put that money into the better choices at your grocery store if your farmer's market meat is as crazy expensive as ours.
6. Plant things- On a daily basis, we take and take from the world around us. If you can grow things where you live, even on your patio, grow them! Creation is one of the most beautiful things we can do as human beings, so do it more. Not to mention, if you are taking care of even a small percentage of what farmer's are doing, you can better appreciate the labor being put in.
7. Reuse! We receive the message over and over as Americans that we should want the newest, biggest, or best thing. Sometimes, the best thing we can do is figure out how to make the best of what we have first. I know as we have been looking for furniture, there are so many places selling simple things like shelves and dressers used, and you can paint and fix them up for way less than new furniture. The more you can make the best of what you have, the less you are using resources.
8. Actually unplug things! I am the worst about this, but we could probably all use a lot less electric if we didn't have 1 electronics on at the same time. I also read that if you do a better job caulking holes and weatherproofing your house, you can consume a lot less energy heating and cooling it. My mother got solar panels, and she will get all that money back in electric bills she doesn't have to pay. That's a dramatic move, but I think it is food for thought for us.
9. Compost and Recycle- If your community doesn't support it, this may be a fight worth having. Organic waste in regular dumps are much less likely to break down over time, so it only adds to the giant pile of junk taking over- do we really want to live like they do in Wall-E?
10. Write when a company packages things badly- Amazon often asks for packaging feedback- If you are receiving things that use unrecyclable packing material, complain. I just wrote the company we bought our crib from, because it came in all sorts of styrofoam. You can also question a store or company when things are packaged way more than they need to be- why is that even there?
11. This is huge, YOU VOTE WITH YOUR MONEY- If you spend money on something unethical, you are telling that company that you are ok with it, they should put more money into that, etc. If you care about animals, why would you tell them it is ok to treat them badly? Do the research, and if it seems sketchy, it probably is.

Obviously, all of these might be tiny steps, but they add up. After 5 years of using canvas bags, I know we have changed how much plastic waste we make.

Even though you can find lots of ideas for concrete steps to take, I think being a Steward of the Earth is more of a mindset than a simple set of concrete steps, because the world we live in makes some good choices completely unavailable. It also is difficult because so often the Earth-friendly choice is not the cheapest or least time-consuming, but that doesn't keep it from being worthwhile. Here is another (much more comprehensive) list of things you can do for your house if you own one (but some of the things on the list are about shopping, so that might help.  This is another essay on Green Living and Christian stewardship that I thought was sweet and on point.

We are going to try to keep trying and stepping up our lifestyle to minimize impact. If you also try to practice good stewardship, how do you do it?

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This is my day, by Vintage Bride Carlye

Dear Reader,
Welcome to Part Two of Carlye's takeover. Today, our gorgeous bride is going to whizz us through her fabulous vintage–inspired day.…

Well, readers, this is my day, my experience – and my advice for you! 
Jase and I met almost eleven years ago at Uni in Swansea, aged just 19. Eight years later, we were living together in London when he took me on a surprise holiday to Venice – and proposed. 


In the next three years, while we established our careers, we went to so many friends' weddings that by the time we tied the knot this summer we had a really good idea of what we wanted our own big day to look like. 

The most important thing for us was that the day had to reflect us as individuals and as a couple. Everything we chose was personal and meaningful to us. And although there were lots of themes going on, everyone understood those details were a reflection of us.

We also wanted to be respectful of the traditions of marriage but not necessarily follow everything if we didn't feel it was right for us. We wanted things to be a bit more friendly, easygoing and informal, just like us! 

As soon as we were engaged, we chose Devon for our wedding as that's where Jase is from. We spent many summers there as students, and decided on our favourite village, Cockington: the most charming place with its thatched cottages and the best tea room.

I really wanted the wedding to reflect my love of all things vintage! I love the 1950s for its elegance and glamour, and the 1960s for its colours and simple style. So I chose a 1960s look for me and 1950s for my bridesmaids. Then we asked everyone to come in their own interpretation of 50s or 60s style. And I must say – though I'm a bit biased – everyone looked stunning! 

To get everyone in the vintage mood, we played a range of vintage music – everything from a 20s charleston to swinging 60s pop. We had a vintage London bus, an old fashioned Post Box for all our cards... even a vintage taxi cab for a photo–booth! 

My bouquet was also made to be similar to my nan's who got married in the late 50s. She loved that I wanted the same! 

My bridesmaids love a bit of vintage too, but are more contemporary in style than me. So we chose a modern dress with a vintage feel: with a halter neck, laced bodice and flared skirt. Then we added a pinny and peep toe shoes for that cute 50s housewife look (we even used the pinny fabric to create extra–special shoe laces!)

My engagement ring is a gold Panther sitting proudly on a branch – inspired by the famous Wallis Simpson Panther Brooch. I definitely wanted something different, so Jase had 'Charlie' (as my panther is now known!) made specially for me. I wanted a branch style ring for my wedding band, and found the perfect one at Alex Monroe. Jase even found a branch style on etsy so we match! 

Jase is a typical big kid, and works in computer–generated special effects. He loves computer games, specially a Japanese series called Final Fantasy. He chose a character that represented us, (for those in the know this was Squall and Aeris!) so we had models of them by the cake. The game also has a classical musical score so I walked down the aisle to 'Aeris' Theme' played by the organist!

We wanted an informal, summery theme and chose Italian to represent our engagement. We kept it simple and rustic – with an Italian menu, prosecco, and a dining room decorated with olive trees and herbs for fragrance. We even put up some of my sister's photographs of Venice. 

We wanted our family involved as much as possible, so we had lots of help with our cake, flowers, stationery, favours and decorations. It made things that extra special. (We had lots of people to thank!)  And both of our families are big cat lovers so our tables were named after all our family cats, past and present.

Our final theme was The Owl & and The Pussycat as Jase had given me a canvas of one of my favourite children's book illustrations from the 60s by Dale Maxey. We used it as part of our invitations (Jase's brother is an illustrator andd designed all our stationery) and decorated the bar area with this theme.

We then tied it all together with the vintage theme in our beautiful tea room: lots of bunting, vintage fabrics and proper cups & saucers – and all beautifully decorated by my mum & sister. 

Our venue was so perfect: Colehayes Park, a stunning Georgian Manor House with dormitory style rooms and beautiful gardens. It's basically a giant holiday home so we rented this for a week and we were allowed to do what we wanted. We weren't restricted to use particular people and that really helped as we were able to add our personal taste to the place, within our budget! 

We wanted the house to speak for itself so we mainly used flowers as its so beautiful & Jase' mum lovely filled the house! We loved that we could invite most people to stay with us & we loved that we had the place to ourselves so it was more informal. We only had a handful of people to help with serving food and drinks. 

We had a great time all helping to set up the venue at the beginning of the week, so we had just close friends and family with us. Most guests arrived the night before, and we all went out for a meal to break the ice. 

On the big day, I was so excited as unfortunately I had been very very poorly in the week up to the wedding (I honestly thought I was going to have to go to hospital) but I woke up feeling great! I ran round the house shouting 'I'm getting married today.' It was great to have friends and family staying with us, all getting ready together! 

The hair and make up team were calm, friendly and fabulous. They got the look perfect and though I still looked quite poorly, they worked a miracle! I loved my Priscilla Presley inspired look! 

My bridesmaids looked so cute with their 50's curls & flower in their hair & I loved their pines! I chose the Liberty print as I love their fabrics & also worked there when I first lived in London after uni! 

The vintage bus was a great surprise for everyone. We all headed to Cockington at a thatched cottage pub a short walk from the church. It was a great opportunity for everyone to meet and greet, calm their nerves or toast the day! It was relaxed and friendly, exactly as we hoped and the best start to the day! I just wish I had been there but I was still getting ready...

It was great to travel together with my mum & sister! Mum had hired a VW campervan to take us to the church – a great surprise – I loved it so much! We did get stuck in traffic and arrive quite late. Poor Jase! 

My mum walked me down the aisle and it was great to have her by my side! 

Afterwards, guests made a beautiful arch outside the church for us to walk through & I had brought everyone a vintage wedding wand by Ginger Ray as an alternative to confetti & was another fun keepsake. 

I actually first brought them the year before, for a best friend's hen do (we were each other's bridesmaid). They were such a hit, she asked if I could bring them to her wedding too! 

Everyone then got back on the bus to the venue. The weather was perfect and so we all enjoyed drinks in the garden before our Italian summer feast by the excellent Dartmoor Kitchens.

We had the speeches before we ate so the very nervous speakers could get this out the way and then relax. They were the most unprepared speeches but also the most spontaneous, funny and heartfelt! Jase's brothers were great – each said a little bit about growing up together, looking up to each other and welcoming me into the family. My sister and grandfather made a speech on my family's side and talked about bring our families together. Everyone was laughing and crying! There wasn't a dry eye in the room! 

The food was perfect. My very clever Auntie and godmother made my cake. I just said I wanted a vintage feel so bless her, already a gifted cook, she went on a course and made lace icing! It looked stunning and tasted delicious! 

We then made things flexible for everyone. Those who wanted cake and a cup of tea could enjoy the vintage tearoom, others could enjoy the bar or the chillout in the Lounge, or take a stroll in the garden before the party got started. 

The tearoom was a great hit with lots of specialist teas including Wedding Breakfast tea from Fortnum & Mason (one of my favourite places) and lots of homemade cakes from a family friend as well as the wedding cake.

We wanted people to feel at home and come and go through the different rooms as they please. We were so lucky that our venue allowed us to do this. I really feel Colehayes is a very special place. The owners are great too – I would highly recommend!

We then opened the dance floor and photo booth. We also had the fabulous Pizza Buona to keep hunger at bay with their made to order stone bake pizzas! Our final salute to our love of Italy! 

Everyone enjoyed themselves until the wee small hours and it was great that most people stayed so no one had to worry about getting home or finishing at a particular time! At midnight, we had an open bar and kept the tearoom going. And we had the added bonus of a basement for our after–party, so the young at heart still had a place to keep dancing but those with tired party feet could also retire upstairs! 

We wanted something for everyone but also still true to us and I think we achieved this. I had the most amazing day and was so overwhelmed to have everyone we know and love in one place.

I also love how everyone's memories, stories and photos help you capture your big day in a way you couldn't imagine. You truly feel very lucky and happy. There are still new moments and stories coming out and I hope that continues for years to come! 

So here's to all Helena's vintage brides – past, present & future! Have a very Happy Wedding Day and may your Heavenly Vintage Wedding Dress bring you lots of love, luck & happiness now and always!

Thanks for letting me share my big day with you! 
Lots of Love 
Mrs. Carlye McCloy-Brown 

For a snapshot of more Real Vintage Brides,
check out my website page here...

Photographs with thanks to Alice of The Vintage Wedding Photographer 

Bride's dress: Original 1960s lace wedding dress – Heavenly Vintage Brides of course!
Bride's Shoes: 1960s Vintage Lace from Candy Says
Bride's Underwear: M&S
Bridesmaids' dresses: Chi Chi London
Bridesmaids' shoes: Mojo Moxy 
Bride's Hair & Make Up: Claire & Rebecca of The Popup Salon
Photo Booth: Alfie the Black Taxi Cab Booth
Groom's Suit: Ben Sherman Tailoring
Shoes: Kurt Geiger 
Best Men Suits: Topshop
Bridesmaid's Pinnies, Ushers / Best Men / Groom Cravats & Pocket: Liberty Art Fabric
Stationery: Groom's brother Danny Deeptown 
Meet & Greet: The Drum Inn, Cockington 
Wedding Ceremony: St George & St David's Church, Cockington, Devon
Wedding Reception: Colehayes Park, Bovey Tracey
Caterers: Dartmoor Kitchens 

And best of all…
Cake by Bride's aunt
Flowers by Groom's mum
Decoration by the mums, close family & friends

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Ten Things I Wish We Knew Before Making our Baby Registry

Picture Credit- Jenny Bickel Photography

Being prego is obviously exciting, but it also turns out to be a lot of research. It's kind of like trying to prepare for a vacation where you don't know where you are going. It's a shot in the dark, and you can ask around for clues, but you really don't know. When you register for a wedding, you have some vague idea of how to adult, but this is totally different. I know we had no idea what the hell we needed, and my mom showed up the week before the Bub came and filled in a bunch of blanks we hadn't thought of.

Because it's a shot in the dark, we made mistakes, and if I could do it all over again, I would have registered and shopped in such a different way. Learn from my mistakes! This is how I would do it now that I know better:

1. Play the Long Game

 When you are going through it the first time, it can be easy to focus on maybe the next month or so. I mean, we were basically in survival mode for a while. But they grow, and way faster than you are expecting. You can save some money and a whole lot of waste by looking a little further ahead. If you register for baby stuff, ONLY register for 6-9 or 9-12. People will buy you the smaller sizes without encouragement, but those sizes last such a short time (maybe only a month or two), then you look around and you don't have anything to put your baby in. It works this way for everything- the early months seem like you need a lot, but really they are happy with your boob and cuddles, so try to play a longer game.

I will try to point out stuff as we go through the Baby Registry, but off the top of my head, I do recommend registering for larger sizes, bigger bottles and sippy cups, and the larger car seat. That first birthday may seem a long way away right now, but what were you doing a year ago this week? Things move quickly!

And while we are at it, when your nunjas explode and you need a new bra, just buy nursing bras (my suggestion? Bella Materna. Steep but great). When buying maternity clothes, buttoned up chests are perfect. I was back in maternity clothes and expanded stuff for probably the first three months after the Bub was born (they call it the 4th trimester), so that maternity clothes you buy early on can have a lot of use later. Especially if you think ahead.

2.Consignment is your New Best Friend (and You Can Say So)

Before you have a baby, people will tell you they go through things fast, and you kind of get it, but nothing teaches the lesson like when they grow out of their size before you even use all of the super cute outfits you have. 0-3 for us was brutal, because he was out of it by two months. This super quick turnover means somebody spent a bunch of money on nothing.What a waste of money AND clothing! Our country makes tons of textile garbage; the average American throws away 65 pounds of clothing a year- new parents jack up this number. Not only can you save epic amounts of money by buying 80-90% consignment (we save at least half of our clothing budget), but you can minimize that huge pouring into landfills.

The biggest baby clothing companies- Carter's and Gerber- have very sketchy labor policies and environmental impact. And not a thread is stitched in the US. I know before I had the Bub, I poured over Carter's stuff at every store. I picked stuff I loved, and once he was here, I noticed everyone had the same outfits! Trust me, nothing you put your baby in will be cuter than your baby, so you don't have to be "on trend."

If you can buy essentially the same onesie in a kids consignment store for a third of the price, save one more onesie from being in a landfill, and give unethical companies 10 dollars less, it can only be a win. You are making the world a little better for your baby and save SO MUCH money that can go to their future. I only wish I had started sooner.

You shouldn't feel ashamed to let your family know that a great consignment sleeper makes a  completely awesome gift. One of our friends here just put on her invitation that they were trying to cut down their environmental impact, so please buy used clothes for the gift. Will someone roll their eyes? Yes, definitely. But people roll their eyes at me and this blog everyday, and alas, I carry on. This approach to baby clothes will make you more sane, and I promise you will find so much cute stuff.

3. Glass not Plastic- Wood, not Plastic

You will find bottles that claim to be BPA-free, but recent studies show that the BPA substitutes can be just as bad. Plastic is toxic and nasty, so you can do a lot for your child's health by avoiding it whenever possible. Plus, using plastic is just another way to add waste to the world your child will someday inherit from you. We love our Evenflo and Lifefactory glass bottles, and we can reuse them all for as many spawn as we have, then pass them on to someone else to use. No leeching. No contorting in the dishwasher. We even got the Lifefactory sippy lids and use them as sippy cups now.

In the same vein, don't register for toys that have lots of plastic attached- look for wooden teethers and toys instead, because everything will be going in that precious little nugget's mouth before you know it (just watch out for Melissa and Doug, they aren't any better than Fisher Price). They love chewing on everything. Because babies are sometimes assholes who flip your purse and try to eat your change (true story).  Minimize the potentially toxic chemicals by opting out of plastic whenever you can (and hide your pennies).

4. Wipe Warmers= Not Worth it

 You will get so much advice about things you "need" that you may never use (and might melt a piece of your furniture, not that I am bitter or anything). It can be tempting to follow every piece of advice, because you have no idea what the hell you are doing. But preparing for every possibility will leave you broke with a house full of junk you will never use. It's not worth it.

 It's not that you may not need those "needs," but babies, like all people, are greatly individual and variable. Each one comes with their own set of ticks and preferences, and you can wait to see who they are before trying to attend to needs that just don't exist. There will still be stores once your bub arrives, so if you aren't sure, just wait.

5. Neither are 14 Kinds of Swaddle Blankets

You need two kinds. Three if you have cold weather coming.

Muslin blankets for swaddling (Aden and Anais are all the rage, but they aren't ethical. Check this blog for your many options).
Fuzzy blankets if it is cold (I like Swaddle Designs blankets).
And the wonderful handmade blankets your family and friends will make you.

That's it. Don't get conned into the combo kits with swaddles in them. Those swaddle blankets are always crappy anyway. Just avoid sets.

6.There are Eco-friendly and American-made options for everything on your list

 I wish, more than anything, that I had realized how many options I had before I registered for baby. Now that I see him, I want to make the world a little bit better for him every day, and I think a lot of what we bought and registered for earlier on could have had much more positive impact. We got so many "Made in China" Fisher Price things that I see in our baby consignment shop all the time. We wasted so much money on clothes that we would never buy now. We shelled out for toys that he never cared about. We got strollers that were made in China when American-made options were out there.

The truth is, I just never thought about it. I never thought about being eco-friendly, and I just assumed every option was "Made in China." Sure, if I knew that I had a choice between Made in China or America, I would choose America, but I didn't even realize there was an option. Even eco-friendly lists mostly highlight the toxicity you don't want for your child (see- minimize plastic!), and it isn't clear what the most eco-friendly options would be for the world around them.

Options exist. They may not be easy to find, but that's why I am here.

There is always an option. I made the Baby Registry specifically so that these other, so much more eco-friendly, options are clearly available. You can cross check anything on your list with my Eco-Friendly and Made in America Baby Registry to have a registry you can really feel good about. Don't make my mistake!

How many opportunities do you have in life to make a bunch of purchase choices at once? That means you can put all those purchases (by you and your family) towards your baby's needs and your baby's world. These kinds of moments don't come by often. Caring is worth doing, making the switches does good, and you can do this.

7. Don't Be Scared

I am not going to say be confident, you're not an idiot, because most likely you are. Most likely we are too all over again. You are planning for a person you haven't met- there's no way to do that well. There's no reason to know these things, so be sure you have a small army of friends (or one really great one, Rochelle) who already knows what is good.

Ask lots of questions. Ask about wipe warmers. If you ask 3 people and they all say you definitely need something (like a crib or a carrier) you probably do. If there is debate, skip it. If you aren't sure whether you will be a baby wearer or stroller pusher, try to find a wrap used. You can always get something nicer once you know firsthand, but you know yourself and which advice might be worth following. Women chomp at the bit to share baby knowledge, so never be embarrassed to ask other new moms you trust.

Side note, the urge to share advice never goes away, but mommy brain smooths out edges. It's encouraging really that moms look back on things as easier than they were and are (I know it happens, because my toddler has helped block out some miserable infant months of sleep deprivation), but trust me, their kids were not perfect. Grain of salt it, because those memories are sea glass.

You will learn it all so soon. No need to overcompensate because you aren't sure yet. You got this.

8. Join a Buy Nothing Group. Don't Have one? Start one

Since joining Buy Nothing when The Bub was five or six months old, our family has probably saved at least 700 dollars we would have spent. We have received almost all of the Bub's toys, a playplace in the backyard (didn't end up working out, but still), a dining room table, swim diapers, and tons of clothes. I imagine we have saved much more than that. That's a plane ticket. We have also given away that much in stuff, which means our house is never quite as bogged down by baby stuff.

I can't tell parents enough- join your local Buy Nothing group.

Don't have one where you are? Check and see if there is a freecycle group or another option. But really, make the world (and your community) better by starting one. It's a pain upfront, but by the time baby is eating solids, you will have a huge resource at your fingertips.

Babies create a constant turnover in stuff, and joining a Buy Nothing means that you are connected to parents with slightly older and slightly younger children. It means someone has what you need or someone needs what you no longer want, and you can connect easily (and meet! So nice). Even when you don't have anything you need that day, it will make your life better. It's like having random acts of mommy kindness on your newsfeed everyday.

9. Play the Even Longer Game

 Planning on spawning more than once? Then you aren't registering for your baby, you are registering for your babies. Resist the urge to register for anything gender-specific (trust me, someone will get you a sexist, heteronormative, and lame onesie anyway) or made so cheaply it couldn't possibly make it through multiple spawn (looking at you, Gerber- every onesie we got has holes in it now).

We are looking down the barrel at infant #2, and we really don't need much. People keep saying it is because we are having another boy spawn, but the real trick is to buy (and register for) as many versatile pieces as you can. We gave about half Bub One's clothes away when he grew out of them, and gender neutral pieces always made the A team that stayed. As we got better at it, the clothes also mostly avoid too specific gender connotations. Buy stuff that isn't junk (see also; made in America) and don't monogram it or something silly like that.

10. Trix are for Kids. Diaper Bags are for Grown Ups

Baby stuff is so cute. No debating it. And it can be tempting to opt for a diaper bag that looks as adorable as everything else on your list. Don't match the bag to the task, match the bag to your style. If you are cutesy and such, by all means get the bag with Winnie the Pooh or ducks on it. For the rest of us, register for something that looks like a bag you would carry everyday for the next two years of your life. Because that is what you are actually dealing with.

My favorite recommendation is a bag from Oliday, because I had one of their camera bags and it lasted so long. They are simple and neutral, but they also offer backpack options, which does make life way easier as the bub gets bigger.  Tom Bihn makes a well-loved and sportier option. Christy Studio has simple options too. There are so many out there, so be sure to get something you love. Best case scenario, you only have to buy one.




Ah, life experience and wisdom. I wish I had more, but hopefully this is at least a little bit helpful for the expectant moms and dads out there. Do better than I did! And do it for that tiny person, because eventually you will be fond of them, and therefore won't want them to be the boneless garbage people in Wall-E. Please, help me keep our world from being the world in Wall-E. Cute robots aren't worth it.

Interested in more Ethical, Green, and Made in America shopping? Check out my Giant List of Shopping Lists to find all kinds of cool shopping alternatives!

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