A 1940s-style vintage wedding dress for a cool Spring day.

Dear Reader, 
Choosing a vintage wedding dress for an English spring wedding can be a challenge. Of course, it must be gorgeous and glamorous. But it also needs to cover enough skin for our goosebump-inducing climate!

1940s style wedding dress, Florence, from the Heavenly Collection

Actually, I love winter and spring weddings. They're a great opportunity to wear elegant long sleeves and high necks that may simply be too hot in summer. And with this in mind, I've recently made some updates to the Florence dress from my Heavenly Collection of vintage-inspired wedding dresses. 

The original Florence vintage-style wedding dress, with puff sleeves

1940s style Florence wedding dress – new keyhole back detail.

This lovely new Florence has long satin sleeves, set into beautifully detailed shoulders. And the glamour quota stays high with the addition of a subtly sexy keyhole back – just enough to reveal a glimpse of skin.

Long and elegant, 1940s style Florence wedding dress in silk satin

Puff sleeves and pretty lace detail at neck of 1940s style wedding dress

And with lace flutter sleeves – 1940s style wedding dress, Florence

I've also introduced a stunning new colour, Sea Pearl – that positively glows in the light of a cold day.

Flutter sleeves on 1940s style Florence wedding dress

Long and elegant, with simple puffed sleeves: 1940s style wedding dress

Marabou feather wrap, perfect for a winter or spring vintage-style wedding

Spring and winter weddings also offer a wonderful choice of vintage accessories. Feathers or fur? Winter blooms in icy hues, or freshest spring flowers? The options are so romantic.

Late winter blooms, eucalyptus, pale roses and frosted berries

Swan feather wedding cape – perfect with a vintage wedding dress for spring.

Try a feather wrap like my own above – made from ostrich and marabou. Or this beautiful swan feather wedding cape from Not on the High Street. Or fur is fabulous – whether a real vintage piece or faux if you prefer...

Fabulous original 1960s fox fur stole

Glamorous vintage bride in faux fur, from a charming 1947 photo!

A cosy faux fur jacket or shrug can also work perfectly with a short-sleeved dress, such as Florence (below) with a lace flutter sleeve. I love the real vintage bride in the photo above – teaming her dress with that super-fabulous faux fur! 

1940s style wedding dress, Florence, with lace flutter sleeves

White fur stole – perfect to keep you warm at a chilly spring wedding.

If you like real fur, you can find wonderful vintage fur wraps and shrugs at Central Park Vintage. Another great place to seek out a fur or faux fur shrug is The Hammersmith Vintage Fair – I am a regular visitor for their great selection of accessories. 

Glorious pale blooms for an early Spring wedding.

And each version of Florence works beautifully with the current vogue for natural accessories. From the beautiful blooms from Brides.com to these stunning nature-inspired headpieces by Abby at Cherished.

Nature-inspired hair accessories complement a vintage wedding dress

As pretty as real snowdrops! Delicate head-pieces for a vintage style wedding.

I am used to seeing beautiful hair accessories, but I've not seen anything quite like these by Abby at Cherished before - they are small works of art and could have been made to go with the Florence dress. (I can't wait to feature more of them very soon!)

Lovely 1940s-inspired Florence wedding dress, from my Heavenly Collection.

I hope my brides and my readers will love the elegant new member of the Florence family, as much as the original puff-sleeved and flutter-sleeved versions! If you'd like to make an appointment to see Florence in person, do contact me!

And I've hope you've enjoyed these ideas for vintage-inspired late winter and early spring weddings! 

Love

Helena

Heavenly Vintage Brides

If you like this post, please try

Winter Vintage Bride Stephanie

And for more Real Vintage Brides, check out my website page here

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Fourth Anniversary Inspiration- Fruit and Flower Gift Ideas

I love a theme, and the marriage anniversary gift guidelines are both hilariously arbitrary and super fun to take on as a challenge. Every year so far, we have done decorating, food, and our gifts to another level by just following the weirdly wonderful list of suggestions.

For the first year, we made paper decorations like the ones at our wedding (we have enough tissue paper to last a lifetime). For gifts, we exchanged a paper clock and scratch off maps.
For the second year, we rocked it with a cotton sheet tent in our room, where we camped out, watched Top Chef, and did not exchange cotton robes.
For the third year, we ate steak. Well, he ate steak. I covered our house in cows and compromised my cow-loving morals. We exchanged leather photo albums and luggage tags.

It may seem like a silly tradition, but I firmly believe that the key to appreciating life (and having a happy one), is making a big deal about the good things. You can't do anything to stop bad things from happening, but giving the good equal weight, attention, time, and creativity  In my life, The Boy is probably my single favorite life decision, so I am going to make a big deal out of our anniversary week. That doesn't mean forking over lots of dough, just killing it on the theme.

This year's theme? Fruit and Flowers. 

After last year's leather-clad meatfest, this year's theme seems pretty tame. You can also tell that motivation to rock the theme is waning, because both Pinterest and Etsy don't have many suggestions. Pinterest has roses made of bacon and some fruit puns.

 Etsy is mostly selling various roses out of every material you can think of. Also, a t-shirt that says "She still puts up with me after 4 years"- really? This needs to be said after 4 years- how awful are you? Let's not pat her on the back just yet. Four years seems very early to be bragging (maybe that's why no one goes all out for this anniversary- not fresh enough to be fun, not established enough to feel like an accomplishment?).

So, I would never advocate for people to buy something as useless as a metal rose or as embarrassing as that t-shirt. This anniversary feels like a totally wasted creative opportunity out there- sure, sweet and floral sounds feminine, but this really feels like an anniversary about planting things that grow.

Please friend, just don't buy a vase, floral scented candles, or a bouquet from the grocery store. You can get something more useful than that!

So some ideas that would work for either gender...

Something that Grows

 I can see the instinct to go for the bouquet of flowers or edible arrangement when fruit and flowers are the theme, but consider something that will still be growing for future anniversaries as well. Because no one needs another vase, but we could all use more fresh air.

We may not think of flowers and fruit as gifts that persist, but a lilac bush could fill your yard with the best smell ever for years. You have to keep taking care of a raspberry bush or an herb garden (if you don't have much space, you may still have room to grow), but isn't that more like marriage? It always takes a little upkeep, but you get a lot more from it than you would a bouquet long gone by your 5th anniversary.

My best gift idea for this anniversary is to plant or grow something that matters to you and your partner. You could even do it together as the celebration!

A Little Garden Glamour

from West Wind Home Garden

A Planter Box, Decorative Stones, Garden Gnome, or even one of those magic balls would be so cool and funny. Really what says romance more than a garden gnome? PhenomeGnome has quite the selection of classy guys waiting to grace your garden. These balls from Uncommon Goods have really unique designs and I think they light up at night from solar power as well. Made in Canada from recycled glass, so that might be a perfect.

For stepping stones, it doesn't get much cuter than these turtle stones. I can totally imagine the gardens where they would look adorable. When I started looking for garden stones, the vast majority were animal gravestones. Maybe not for an anniversary, but you can find better options. Then it was all for something called "fairy gardens." So maybe you don't do stepping stones on Etsy.

My favorite might be these penny flower stakes for Uncommon Goods- they are made from recycled/ upcycled materials in the US, and they are just so super cute.

from 3D Uni Print

Don't have a big garden to guss up? You could still get a planter! You can't help but love the bulbasaur planters that are all over Etsy, just be sure you are getting one that is a non-ridiculous size (or try a dinosaur planter- cool recycling). Convivial Production sells a hanging basket that somehow looks modern and reminds me of my Grandma's house all at once. For something really original, check out these amazing necklaces at Wearable Planter. Lastly, I love this planter troth from one of my favorite Etsy stores- Andrew's Reclaimed- made of all reclaimed wood. Would be perfect if you want your own little herb garden!

Somewhere to Stop and Smell the Roses

We bought a bench as our big gift for this anniversary- it may sound a little lame, but I am psyched about it. We got a bench from Polywood, so it is made of recycled plastic in the United States. They have gliders too! I love this company even more now- the bench was pretty easy to put together (The Bubba was just so helpful) and it looks even better in person than online.

It is one of those things that looks perfect in its spot in our yard (and it will be so nice for practical moments and sitting together), but with such a long list of to do's, I bet we wouldn't have gone for it for a very long time. I am writing stores on Etsy to try to get a fun plaque for it as well (still debating what to have it say). It's a place to stop in our garden, when in general we just go go go, so I am excited about that little bit of quality time together.

Juicy Fruit

Fruit, when you think about it, is a pretty low maintenance food. You motly eat it raw. You could get a juicer if you think it would get a lot of use (but I can't find one made in the USA- phooey). Microplane sells American-made zesters, which have turned out to be very handy in our house.

from Golem Designs

I can think of two other fruit tools in the kitchen- a fruit bowl or a strainer to wash berries in. I love ones that are a little bit open, like this modern one from Golem Designs and this stunner from Nings Wonder World. This concrete fruit bowl from Rough Fusion looks very sophisticated.

I love this berry buddy from Uncommon Goods- it looks great, is made in Pennsylvania, and it would work perfectly if you are big berry-eating family (like we are). Lots of Etsy ceramicists like Mark's Pottery, Shady Grove Pottery, and Loma Prieta Pottery make berry strainers as well. Want to do something more cost effective? You can also find really cool vintage ones on Etsy or get the strainer from Preserve- made in the USA with recycled materials!

And For Something Truly Not Romantic...

So most of these gift ideas have been at least a little romantic, but the theme does lend itself to getting something practical off your list. Gosh, that is so the 4th year of marriage. Still, if you (or your partner) feel lighter with another to do biting the dust, this might be fun (but go on a romantic date or something- life can't be all practical).

If you still need something bought or something done for your outdoor space, this might be the perfect opportunity to focus on that. Whether you live in a stand alone house or a rented apartment, you may enjoy some outdoor space more with a little boost. Maybe you want a swing for your porch or a hanging tomato garden for your patio. Maybe your porch needs repainted or the stairs need fixed. This can be a perfect opportunity to tackle something together and to put a little attention into spaces that can be forgotten.

Good Ideas from Amazon

One of the least romantic options for this would be a composter. It's kind of like a pretty vase, but you put the flowers in after they are dead. It may seem really boring or lame, but you can keep making great soil for you yard this way and save so much from a landfill. A banana peel in a kitchen garbage bag may never decompose. In your composter, it will in a week. So eco-friendly and it will save you money too! If you have the room, Good Ideas makes great composters, but if you need something a little smaller, check out this Envirocycle one.

Idlyc from Amazon

Not yard people? No worries! You could also get totally unromantic about your grocery shopping. Rather than using those plastic produce bags which are used once and then shipped to the landfill, you could get produce and grocery bags to shop with! Honestly, we just use a reusable grocery bag and throw everything into one bag. Why not? We are just going to wash it all when we get home anyway, so what are the little bags protecting them from? Hot peppers are the only thing that gets their own bag.

Fruit and Flower Art

Both fruit and flowers are the subject of lots of cool prints and paintings, so you could also buy something to help decorate your kitchen.

from Jessica Haas Designs

My favorite of all of these are seasonal food calendars- we bought one of these ones from Jessica Haas Designs for our house, and it can really help you keep track of what is good when at a local level (I just wish we had a cheat sheet for which fish are pictured). I have lusted over this garden chart from Little Low literally for years, but we don't have room in our kitchen, so it just sits in my Etsy cart. For years. No joke. Someone get it- it's so pretty. They have all sorts of beautiful prints, so check out this store. Also try- Lucile's Kitchen, Cactus Club, lh print shop, Season's Gleanings, and Lou Paper.

This map from artist Wendy Gold turns the whole world into bouquets of flowers. This is so pretty, and it reminds me of Napoleon's wife who had a huge collection of gorgeous botanical drawings. May be the perfect piece for a mudroom or office.

If you want to gift something really different, these stained glass panels are both geometric and organic. I love that they are made in Kentucky, and it could look perfect in your window.

Ok, these are my best ideas, what are yours? How do you make a gift thoughtful, fun, and useful all at the same time!? It's a tall order, but I believe it can be done!

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Wedding Wednesday- How to Save on Wedding Decorations

Oy, wedding costs! You go into it with a vision, and then slowly, that vision can be chipped away just by the shrinking amount still left in the budget. Before you are really planning, you spend a lot of time plotting decorations and cool details, but those are often the things that get cut for the sake of the event as a whole. Some of that is inevitable, but I do think there are cool ways to approach decorations that can save you BIG money.

Even better, if you shift your approach to the stuff you buy for the wedding, you can save things from landfills and create less waste. So many of these decor pieces are used one night only, but if they are shared between many couples, they can have much longer and happier lives.

1. Let the Space do the Work- You picked your venues for a reason. Start with that premise and just let the beauty of your wedding and reception spaces shine through. If it's already a good-looking spot, you may not need much. Don't pick a theme that doesn't fit the room, and you have already saved yourself tons of money.

2. Focus on Lighting (and someone can always lend you lights)- If I had to decorate a whole reception with one item, it would be white twinkly lights. Lighting sets the mood, makes everything look intentional (even when it isn't), and adds that magical thing. Even better, you can almost always find lighting as a rental or used. Twice this summer, I have seen brides gifted tons of Christmas lights for their weddings on Buy Nothing. If you do get lights lent to you, be sure to mark who each strand belongs to. Otherwise, you can get this high impact item for very cheap or even free.

3. DIY it- I love browsing the decoration ideas on Etsy, but I am often struck how many of the things on there can just be made- you don't need to buy them! Sparkly branches? Glue, glitter, and a walk in the woods. Tissue paper flowers? Buy some bulk tissue paper and wire. Peg doll cake topper? Paint that business yourself. We made our escort cards from paint swatches- it doesn't have to be expensive to be memorable and fun.

 When you buy decor, you are paying for time and skill. Work ahead so you have the time, and you can self-assess which skills are within your wheelhouse. You can a little bit of money go a lot further this way! Only trick is to plan ahead!

4. Focal Points over Details- I have seen so many weddings where there were fussy centerpiece things at the table but nowhere to look in the room. Make a few spots really worth looking at and don't bother trying to make every corner beautiful. People will only remember a handful of things anyway.

5. Multi-task- Use your favors or cake or guests as decor. You have millions of choices dependent on your favor, but it's a nice way to have something do double duty. I went to a wedding last year where the cakes were the centerpieces, which saves tons of money on flowers, and you get more time with cake, so who can complain? Stepping out of the box even a little might help you figure out how to make what you are already paying for a key part of the room.

6. Everything Doesn't Have to Match Perfectly- Matchy matchy can be great if you are meticulous, but a little variation never hurt anyone. One of my best friends is very detail-oriented and got all the colors to match perfectly at her wedding. And it looked amazing, but it doesn't have to go that way. If you can find 40 free plates that look one way and 50 that look another, and they both fit, just use them both. It's more important to have a set sense of style than an overly particular matching set mentality. That sense of style and vision for the big picture is what will have the impact in the end.

7. And Please Don't Monogram your Napkins- Why. Why. Why. Why is this even still a thing? If you are doing the little cocktail napkins, by all means, get them in a color that resonates with your scheme (even better, get them recycled from a company like Susty). But why is this insta-garbage a good time to remind people whose wedding they are attending? No one has forgotten, and honestly, it is never all that classy. Put your money into other details, and then whatever you don't use can be for another couple or your dinner parties. Put the date on your favors, and skip the rest.

8. Get It Used- This is the most cost-effective AND eco-friendly thing you can do for your wedding decorations. So many wedding decorations become one time use things, and I hate to think of all the perfectly useful objects that get thrown out. But the bright side is you can find so much out there if you just know where to look and don't mind some browsing.

You can find great used decorations:

Newlyweds- We all know these big life events happen in waves. If you have friends getting married before you, check and see what you can get off their hands once they are hitched. We definitely gave decorations away to the Boy's beloved cousin, and our lights to the high school for dances. Your friends will have stuff they are happy to part with. Doesn't perfectly match? Get creative about what you can stretch to fit or change the color of and then offer the rest to others. After your hitched you can pay the favor forward!

On Buy Nothing- Have you joined your local Buy Nothing Project yet? I have seen it all on there- people offering their table runners to other asking for (and receiving) tons of glass vases for their center pieces. Check with your Buy Nothing and you could save 100's of dollars.

Goodwill and other Consignment Stores- Sometimes, this kind of shopping is a bust, but if you know what you need, you might find a steal. Also, lots of cities have craft consignment stores that might sell the ribbon or fabric you need as well.

Online Resale sites- Thank goodness for the internet, because you can now find everything you would ever want to decorate with used. Cheaper, convenient, and keeping things out of landfills? Amazing.

Ruffled is an absolute treasure, and you can find so many gorgeous things on their "Recycle your Wedding" pages. They have at least a thousand items, so it's a lot to go through, but you are sure to find something.  Make sure to check the price against the brand new cost, and don't be afraid to ask them to lower it a little (I mean, what else are they going to do with 100 extra mason jars?) Browse often, because things are going up all the time! You can find a steal on beautiful decorations.I may actually buy some things from them for a non-matrimonial party.

Tradesy- Tradesy started as wedding only, but they have had enough success to branch out. They have all kinds of wedding stuff, from bridesmaid dresses to wedding papers, but their decorations section is especially amazing and well-organized. They have 5,500+ items up right now! Easier to browse than most of the other sites as well. Be sure to join their mailing list so you get even more money off.

Wedding Recycle- This website also has lots of selection (about 3000 items) and they are connected to the Can't Buy me Love Project, where you donate wedding dresses that can be given away to brides who otherwise couldn't afford them. Pretty cool.

So you may be overwhelmed with the amount of money you have already spent nailing down the DJ and planning with the caterer. I don't blame you- weddings are expensive! But decorations is an area that with a little creativity, you can make huge impact with a little bit of money.

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Wedding Wednesday- Disposable Necessities Done Right

Now I know all you unmarried wonderful people are almost tired of browsing ethical engagement rings. Must be time to fantasize about your future eco-friendly compostable wedding plates- right?

My brother and his longtime, lovely girlfriend are getting married this year, and I couldn't be more psyched about it. I have been trying to be helpful (ok, I have been giving wayyyy too much unsolicited advice to two perfectly competent adults). One of the things my soon to be sister-in-law did ask for advice on was plates for the reception that were one time use but eco-friendly.

This is a challenge lots of us face for our weddings (or really any big party we throw)- when you host a party that big, it isn't surprising that some of the wares will be disposable. Maybe you are renting tables, chairs, plates, and silverware, but I bet you have had the cocktail napkin conversation (GAH!!! Do not get monogrammed napkins. Everyone already knows what wedding they are at- what a waste of money). Or maybe you are going to buy straws and cups for the bar.

This topic is boring (no, really!), so it doesn't get much attention on most wedding sites, but your approach to what you throw away might be the singlemost environmentally-conscious decisions you make. How much of this blessed day would you like to go to a landfill?

Disposable is certainly easy to come by (and cheap), but think about your priorities before you go that way across the board. Please, if you can rent any of these supplies from your caterer (or the venue or a local party rentals place), do it. Renting means reuse, which is exponentially less harmful for the environment than any one time use goods.

That being said, sometimes the cost difference is ridiculous, and other times (with things like straws and cocktail napkins), a rentable option may not exist. Maybe you are doing a big potluck picnic or another party where disposable makes the most sense. We used paper straws and plastic cups (would do that differently now), and I think most couples do end up with a mix. If you splurge a little on compostable and recycled goods for even half of these items, your wedding will have a significantly more positive impact on the world you will be married in.

If this isn't for you, but you want to do a little, don't buy any plastic. No plastic plates, straws, or cups. They are incredibly wasteful, dangerous to wildlife, and will outlive our grandchildren. Plastic is a problem, never a real solution.

So if you are doing the world's most boring wedding shopping, let me join you. Here are some things worth looking into:

Plates

Americans throw out a trillion disposable plates A YEAR. Can you even imagine a trillion? At the very least, we can make the ones we add compostable.

Some people use all disposable plates, and others only go that route for dessert or appetizer plates. Whatever you need to do is what you need to do, but I think you can find something classier and eco-friendly all at once. Yes, you can get a plastic plate in exactly your colors, but 100+ plastic plates straight to a landfill? Kind of a bummer, and you might be able to find something just as cost-effective while being much more eco-friendly. Plus, I think the perfectly matched thing only works for particular styles, and you have to be very meticulous to make it work. It's a wedding. White always makes sense.

As a side note, LOOK AROUND and see where you can buy what you want in bulk. If you buy your plates 25 at a time, you will be wasting money. Track those bigger sets down on websites like Eco Party or Webstaurant Store.

Susty Party from Amazon

Our Pick- I think if you are going for an elegant look, it doesn't get much better than the Susty Party square plates. They are sturdy, look so sharp for a table, and cost about as much as any "premium" plastic plates they sell for weddings (around 50 cents a plate). They have a dessert plate as well, and I just think this is an absolute winner if you are having a more elegant or classic wedding.

Leafware from Amazon

If you are doing something more rustic, I love these Leafware plates (compostable, not recyclable) and made out of palm leaves. They are very sturdy and look gorgeous and modern. Plus, they will decompose, so they create no waste. Win! If they don't quite fit your style, check Thynk and CiboWares as well.

Other Options- Susty also sells a more rustic and papery option that still look great and these ones are made in America as well. For any of our regular life parties, this is probably what we would buy. They scream picnic to me, not necessarily wedding (though some colors look more polished than others), but if you are having a more picnicky shindig, this is an awesome option.

Bamboo options, like these plates from Bambu, exist as well! Find an aesthetic that works for yoru style. If you want something even more low key, try these plates from Earth's Natural- still completely biodegradable and only 18 cents a plate!

Cups

Susty Party from Amazon

We definitely used plastic cups at our wedding bar (there may still be some floating around 4 years later). If I could go back, I would put our drinks in something more eco-friendly. Because, why not? If one more good thing (beyond the dancing) came out of our alcohol, who can complain?

Our Pick- I tried to find ones that don't advertise themselves too much, not because there is anything wrong with being environmentally-psyched, but it doesn't always look that pretty. Susty Party sells both clear compostable cups and even more environmentally-friendly paper cups, so they may be the big winner in this category.

Other Options- There are tons of other options, and some like Zilchables are even made in the USA. They all have branding on them, which is a pain in the butt, but if you are less fussy than me and don't care, you can find a great deal and a huge eco-friendly win- Eco-Products, Stalkmarket, World Centric, and Repurpose.

Make sure to to poke around and find the bulk option that best fits the number you were thinking- great way to save some money!

Straws

Tranquilo from Amazon

Who doesn't love a straw in their cocktail? If you want a little something extra at your bar, paper straws are biodegradable and eco-friendly. Plus, they are trendy enough that you can absolutely find something eco friendly AND in your colors!

Our Pick- Tranquilo straws are made from paper, in the US, and money goes to Ocean Clean Up projects. Their stated goal as a company is to eliminate the "needless consumption of disposable plastic products." As you can probably guess, this company is one of my absolute favorites. If you are buying straws for anything, buy these ones. The options on Amazon are limited, but you can find more on Tranquilo's website.

Other Options- Any paper straws are a thousand times better (and classier) than any plastic straw. You do more good if you find ones that haven't traveled far (so maybe not Kikkerland- at least try their subset Green Party Straws that biodegrade). I really love Aardvark straws because they have lots of colors, biodegrade, and are made in the USA. You also do more good if you find ones using recycled paper. Crave sells all recycled ones, so it might be a great option.

Still can't find the perfect straw? Hello, Etsy. "Paper Straws" and the USA filter gets you 16,000+ options. Some of my favorites- Puppy Cat Crafts (every color or pattern you could possibly want), Cherished Blessings (super affordable if you can find your color), The Papered Table (great options all around) and The Party Gnome (crazy patterns, but I like the birch if you are doing a rustic wedding). You can probably get all you would need for 10-20 dollars, and it is so much cuter than those damn cocktail napkins.

Silverware

Brichware from Amazon

Ugh, plastic silverware is the worst, right? What a waste to use a piece of plastic once and then send it off to the landfill. You still have better options than horrible plastic- even recycled plastic isn't great if you are just going to toss them. We will never go back to this- it just doesn't make sense. The wooden and biodegradable stuff looks and feels better too, and the price difference isn't too significant when you buy in bulk.

Our Pick- Wooden Cutlery. They really do look beautiful, and I think they could work with so many wedding styles. I couldn't find a specifically "Made in America" brand, so let's do the best we can. My favorite might be these Birchware wood cutlery- they have clean modernist ones and more elegant choices, so I think it could be great for so many weddings. I also think buying the pieces separately makes sense since you need way more forks than spoons for most menus.

You have more options, some of which cost less, so look around and find the wood (and biodegradable) options that work for you- HUJI Disposable (super cost-effective), Perfect Stix (also well-priced and great reviews), Creative Juice Cafe, and Pretty Sweet Party.

Other Options- Bioplastic. You can get plastic made from plants that still biodegrades I don't think it is nearly as attractive, but you can save money and it still biodegrades! Repurpose has a line of biodegradable silverware and you can get everything you possibly need (maybe for your whole marriage). I love that they are out to replace all those disposables that hurt your wedding's carbon footprint. Transitions 2 Earth has some to look out as well- they are made in China and biodegrade over 5 to 20 years. So mixed bag, but still an improvement on plastic.

Napkins

Now I know I have been pretty secretive about how I feel about decorative napkins at weddings. You probably aren't sure where I stand. Oh you are? Alright, well let's just leave it there then.

If you aren't going to use them as major decor, I say go basic. If your wedding aesthetic works with that recycled kraft color, go that route. If not, white and recycled is still way more eco-friendly.

Our Pick- My loyalty remains with Seventh Generation for eco-friendly paper goods, and you can get 100% recycled lunch napkins (in white or kraft) at low prices. They don't sell cocktail napkins, so for that, I would recommend Hoffmaster kraft napkins which are 100% recycled and made in the US.

Susty Party from Amazon

Other Options- Susty Party sells some cocktail napkins with great-looking designs (you can find them here too). I can't remember one napkin from any wedding I attended, but maybe you love a good napkin. Start with this company then. If you want something plain white, Tree Free cocktail napkins are made of bagasse (sugar cane) instead of tree products. They also donate proceeds to the Arbor Day foundation!

Need more eco-friendly wedding inspiration? It isn't all about one thing- you can take so many routes to make your wedding that much more ethical and kind to the environment. Check the Eco-wedding tag for more ideas.

Need mroe general shopping inspiration? Nice! Check out the Giant List of Shopping Lists.

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Wedding Wednesday- 10 (Eco-friendly) Ways to be the Favorite Shower Guest

In one lifetime, most women will go to a LOT of bridal showers. Some will be of women who absolutely own our hearts. Others will be for our boyfriend's cousin's fiance where we will awkwardly sit in the corner. Either way, there will be a registry, and there will be a long chunk of shindig where we watch the bride, groom, or both open gifts.

So, how does bridal showering change when you are trying to be eco-friendly or buy local?

It can be a challenge. The couple gets to make an exact list of what they want, and if it turns out to be full of Made in Elsewhere junk that hurts your heart to buy, you can really feel stuck between compromising your own priorities or being the jerk buying decorative birdhouses.

These are my best ideas of how to be an awesome guest, how to break the mold enough to be interesting, but not so much that you are the one they tell stories about later. You can kick ass at bridal showering and stay eco-friendly! Here's how:

1. Pair the Personal with the Practical- Something small and personal makes for the most memorable gifts. One of our friends gave us a little stone with our faces painted on as a wedding gift. It is still one of my favorites. I also received two quilts and a blanket that I love and continue to be in use at our house. If you know the wedding colors or something they might need for the wedding, you could go that route. We received some things that were thoughtful, but not that useful (a lot of decorative platters) and some that were practical but not personal, but if you can combine registry desires with a personalized theme or something you made yourself, you can really nail the gift.

2. Forget Adulting, Put in for the Honeymoon- Looking at the registry and having trouble finding an eco-friendly option? Ugh, that smarts. The couple may be equally happy to accept money OR if you want to go big, ask after their honeymoon and put money specifically toward that. Wedding showers are especially all about practicality, and that can become a drag, so see if you can't invest in a cool memory for them on their trip.

There are registries specific for honeymoon funds, but even if they don't have one, I bet they will love the help. I know one of my friends skipped out on the activity she most wanted to do, because it was too expensive. In retrospect, I wish I could have skipped the wedding/shower gift and put money in for that. Stuff is just stuff, but making new and amazing memories can fuel a marriage.

3. Come Prepared to Have Fun- You want to give your bride a gift? Have a great time. The hosts can only prepare so much- once you get to a party, the fun of the shindig depends on all of the guests. Time to play silly games? Go into it with Olympic intensity to make it awesome. Small talking with the bride's crazy relatives? Lean in, my friend. Don't sit in the corner, only hang out with your people, or worst of all, let someone else be uncomfortable or alone.

At a wedding, in my expert opinion, you are contractually obligated to start the bride and groom's marriage off with a full dance floor and happy faces. Do the shower version of that.

4. Write a Good Note- Showers can be overwhelming events where the bride or groom doesn't get the time they hope for with each guest (I know I felt that way). No matter what you decide to gift, a thoughtful note and some encouragement might be the best gift you can give. Write something personal and genuine, and you could very well make his or her day when they can really go through things without an audience.

5. Skip the Lingerie- No one wants to open something seedy with all of their aunts watching. Maybe someone does, but if you aren't sure that is that bride, just skip it. If you want to do something romantic, buy some gift certificates to local restaurants and invest in some date nights. Seriously, underwear gifts are way more weird than clever.

6. Go in Together for One Gift- Don't hate- collaborate! You may not have the.budget for a really fabulous gift, but you could go in with other guests to go big. We get into this idea that more gifts= better gifts, but there is something to be said for a gift they may not be able to afford themselves. They can go buy a kitchen clock themselves, but a new set of knives might be way out of reach. Not to mention, this gesture might save them from the long, awkward present-opening part of the shindig, which is a lot of pressure.

You can do this two ways- collect money anonymously, and figure out what you an buy with it. Or, pick something first and let people donate with knowledge of the endpoint. Spend less time worrying whether the generosity is equal- it's not a competition.

7. Take Pictures- Ok, maybe this seems silly, but I think one of the best things you can do for a couple on the path to getting married (or having a baby) is to be positive, enthusiastic, and to help document any and all festivities. You get to the other end of things and can feel like it slipped through your fingers, so some pictures from others helps them have a fuller perspective on these days and all of the good stuff happening. It costs you no money, minimal time, and can really be so sweet and thoughtful.

8. Make the Switch or Get out of the Box- Not excited about the registry? You can try to do a switch out using my suggestions on The Eco-Friendly and Made in America Wedding Registry. Don't see anything that speaks to you? What are some other things they will definitely need? What about movie tickets or some other kind of date night? Gift cards for take out places with their menus? A cheese of the month club. Invest in the memories they will make as a couple! Or go a totally different route and cut out a practical concern for them- give them all the quarters they will ever need for laundry with The Simply Co soap and dryer balls. Get them all the tissues they will ever need and a throw blanket for sick days. Get them Amazon Prime or a netflix subscription. By shifting your paradigm to less concrete gifts, you can really come up with something cool.

9. Buy 3 Used Gifts Instead of One New One- This is true for baby showers too- some things on registries (measuring cups, anything glass, kitchen tools) are ALWAYS for sale in consignment and antique stores. Still look at what they want, but get something a little more special and a LOT more cost-effective. You can get 4 kitchen tools at Goodwill for the same cost as one from Bed Bath and Beyond. Way to help them fill up that kitchen AND reduce waste!

10. It's All About Them- Sometimes you know the bride or groom better than others; it is well worth it to keep who they are in mind before you go for it. Maybe they are the kind of people who would LOVE practical gifts like a year's worth of paper towels and toilet paper- think of the drudgery they can skip! Other people would hate it. If you aren't sure, call one of those numbers on the RSVP line and ask them. If it still seems risky, do 60% what they said they want and 40% something a little riskier.

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Wedding Wednesday- Where to Donate your Wedding Dress

taken by first blush photos

Whether you got married 3 weeks ago or 30 years ago, you may very well still have your dress sitting in a closet somewhere. This is one of those things that tends to get carried from house to house. Some of us have a lot of emotional attachment to the dress. Some of us have hopes that a family member will want to wear it someday (though I think if you got married during the age of super synthetic dresses, the odds are low). Some of us just don't know how to get rid of it, because throwing it out feels wrong.

Wedding dresses are a pretty environmentally tricky purchase- you spend a lot of money on something that will only be used once. I know I looked at lots of used dresses, but never had the nerve to buy one that way. Now, I think I might have gone about it differently. I did end up with a dress I loved, but in the end, I am not sure it made that huge of a difference.

This blog covers a lot of territory on shopping more ethically, but one of the most eco-friendly things you can do is to have less and to get rid of things in an ethical way. Sure, maybe someday your daughter will want to wear your wedding dress (she won't) but in that time, that dress could have lived multiple lives or multiple weddings. In an ideal world, we would all be way more willing to let things go, because the more used stuff is out there, the more we can all invest in secondhand instead of more brand new stuff that will land in a landfill.

So, the question becomes, where can you offload that wedding dress?

First, you could sell it online for yourself, make a little money back, and help out another bride. Here are some options:

Once Wed was my favorite place to browse dresses, and I think you can resell decor as well. Honestly, if I could do it all again, I would probably buy a dress from here.

Preowned Wedding Dresses is probably the most commonly used, though I tried to sell a dress on here and it never worked out. Still, if you have a recent dress that someone can still go to the store and try on, you might have a lot more luck than I did.

Second, you could donate it to an organization that will sell it secondhand to help make them money (my favorite idea, but you do you). Some ideas:

Adorned in Grace, based in Northern Oregon and Southern Washington, sells bridal and formal wear (so maybe somewhere to donate all those bridesmaid dresses?) to raise money to help women once caught in human trafficking and to raise awareness of the epically huge problem. Pretty awesome cause if you ask me. Your dress gets a second life, AND you get to help other women. So cool. I think I will send a few old prom and bridesmaid dresses their way.

Angel Gowns breaks your heart and makes you feel better about the universe at the same time. These organizations take donated wedding gowns and turn them into dresses for stillborn babies or babies that pass away. If your dress is older and you don't think some of the other organizations would want them, look into the multiple angel gown organizations to give a special gift to parents going through something truly awful.

Brides Across America is incredibly cool because it doesn't sell your dress, it gives it away to a military bride planning their wedding (a big challenge when your fiance is serving far away). This charity has given away wedding gowns to 12,000  brides in events all over the country. What a cool way to say thank you. They only accept dresses five years old or younger, so stop wringing your hands and go for it already.

The Bridal Garden- If you are shopping or donating in the New York City area (looking at you, Kleinfeld shoppers), the Bridal Garden sells wedding dresses to benefit underserved children in the New York area. Give them your dress or start your shopping there instead of the big salons.

Brides for a Cause is a huge and very successful consignment salon that sells their dresses "for charity" It felt a little vague to me (ok, a cause, but which one?), but they do donate to Brides Across America right now, so you are still contributing to a very positive mission by donating your dress to them. I love it.

Brides for Haiti sells your dresses to raise money for Saint Joseph's Parish's charitable work in Haiti. Looks a little trickier in terms of shipping, but otherwise great!

The Brides Project in Toronto sells the donated dresses with the profits all going to cancer charities; this store has already put 600,000 dollars into cancer charities! That's awesome!

Success in Style is a Baltimore-based organization that gives out of work individuals wardrobes to help in their business lives. They have a consignment store to fund their mission, and now they accept wedding gowns for their wedding consignment store Cherie Amor.

Wish Upon a Wedding gifts weddings and vow renewals to men and women (regardless of sexual orientation, which I think is especially important) suffering from terminal illnesses. I am looking around, and I am not positive they still accept dresses, but if you can't donate your dress, you could still sell it and donate the proceeds.

I know I have a dress I bought on super clearance panic(like 70% off?) that has been sitting in a closet since 2012. I am offering it on Buy Nothing, but if there aren't any bites, it is moving on to one of these charities. I am not sure if I am ready to have my wedding dress see the same fate, but I am seriously thinking about it.

When you see all these things your dress can do, it seems like it is really underperforming in your closet, right? I know I struggle with the idea of parting with my dress, and I don't know if I will muster the courage or not, but the more dresses get multiple uses (and do all these wonderful things for people who need them) the better for everyone.

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