Bumpwatch Week 30

 

How Far Along: We just finished our 30th week! Now, this is when the Bump actually loses its mind, because apparently the baby is the size of a cucumber. A cucumber? Really? What hot house are we talking about here? Also, if all I am housing is a mutant cucumber, why do I keep expanding like a balloon?

Best Moment of the Week: Not having gestational diabetes! I had to take the long test this week, which included lots of blood taking and pregnancy quizzes (apparently I will be a laid back planner mom... so yeah). I found out the next day that I don't have the Betes, so we celebrated this weekend with ice cream. I was mentally prepared to step up my diet, but it's good news I don't have to.

Most Interesting Prego Quirk: Eventually you only have so much room inside of you, and at some point (for me, around when he became the size of Larry the megacucumber) there isn't enough room for everything to function. This is why pregos are so ready for it to be over by the end. I now get it. Basically, you just have to get used to your basic functions not being completely cooperative.

I Would Really Like Some: Nectarines. Also, scallops. Also, a ham sandwich. As has been the case for the first 30 weeks, I would like all the food, please.

 

Bizarro Thing No One Warned me About:  Some people's belly buttons pop into outies. Some people's belly buttons linger in a weird place and no longer take straightforward paths inward. Also, these mutants look weirdly like they are smiling. I would prefer to just be Pilate with no belly button. It may be the creepiest thing my body has ever done. Everyone talks about the cute outies, but no one really expands on the strange dilemas your belly button starts to face.

And The Boy?: He has started conspiring with BBG. For example, he says "Bumbo Baby, if you kick me in the next 24 hours, it means you NEED a raspberry and I should raspberry your mom's belly all the time." Since the parasite is quite the dancer, I assume this will only escalate, and I am not sure I like them working against me.

Looking Forward to: Jury duty this week! Yeah, time to do some civic dutying. Also, it would be a bummer if I actually felt caught up with my life, so this should keep it interesting. We have our first baby class on Saturday, which is about baby safety and should be truly horrifying. Other than that, things should mostly plateau because we have no more travel until our spawn travels with us, outside of my uterus. 

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Quote of the Week- Stewardship and Green Practices

“It is possible, I think, to say that... a Christian agriculture [is] formed upon the understanding that it is sinful for people to misuse or destroy what they did not make. The Creation is a unique, irreplaceable gift, therefore to be used with humility, respect, and skill.”

 “We depend upon other creatures and survive by their deaths. To live, we must daily break the body and shed the blood of Creation. When we do this knowingly, lovingly, skillfully, reverently, it is a sacrament. When we do it ignorantly, greedily, clumsily, destructively, it is a desecration. In such desecration we condemn ourselves to spiritual and moral loneliness, and others to want.”

- Wendall Berry

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3 Things I am Grateful for Today- Kathleen Hanna, Jenny Bickel, and Power Sanders

from blog.kexp.org

1. The Punk Singer- Sini Anderson's documentary about Kathleen Hanna is a cool and cursory look into one of the biggest badasses of third wave feminism and the illness that has kept her from being as active and visible in the last few years. Hanna puts herself out in a shockingly vulnerable way, and some of the footage of her fighting lime disease is horrible and oddly romantic. I am not sure the documentary does its rich subject justice, but I definitely feel like I know more about her and have been feeling that lingering guilt in the face of feminist awesomeness all day, so the documentary is clearly doing something right.

2. Pictures by Jenny Bickel- When we were home for the shower, my wonderful ad super talented friend Jenny took some prego pictures for us. We got them back (so fast! we aren't used to that), and despite our deep commitment to awkwardness, they came out looking beautiful. If you are in the Franklin area and want portraits of any kind taken, I highly recommend Jenny, who is wonderful, hardworking, quick, and able to make us look somewhat serene. Check her pictures out here.

3. Power Sanders- This hit me like a lightning bolt. How could I have been so wrong all these years and projects sanded by hand? The speed has changed my life. I will refinish anyone's furniture now, just ask.

Bonus- This lady's birthday. She is just the best, and she teaches amazing lessons about the power of faith, positivity, and gratitude. No other birthday fills me with such happiness, and I can't wait to celebrate her next birthday cancer-free!

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Divine inspiration: the Italian nun making wedding dreams comes true.

Dear Reader,
I first saw this uplifting story in the New York Times a little while ago. Do read on, I think you'll be charmed...

High in the hills of Umbria sits a beautiful medieval monastery, St Rita's. It's named after the patron saint of weddings and for 600 years it has been a place of pilgrimage for Italian women, praying to the saint to protect their marriage. And often leaving their wedding dress as a gift of thanks...

And it is here that the wonderful Sister Maria Laura has a completely unique atelier - providing disadvantaged brides-to-be with the dress of their dreams, all completely free. 

Before taking her vows twenty years ago at the age of 28, Sister Maria was a seamstress and designer. Now she applies her skills to re-fitting and re-styling dresses for any bride who could not otherwise afford one!

In return, the brides often make a donation, or simply return their dress after the wedding so that someone else can enjoy it. Sister Maria never leaves the convent, and now has so many brides visiting that this has become a full-time occupation. In her own words...

"It gives me great joy to see a young woman who can fulfil her dream of love with a dress appropriate for the happiest day of her life."

 

What a darling! Sister Maria, we salute you.

Enjoy your weekends, Heavenly friends, and see you again next week.

Love
Helena 
Heavenly Vintage Brides

If you liked this story, try more Inspire Me features


If you'd like to read more about Sister Maria, 
there is also a feature in Stella Magazine.
Photos c. Nadia Shira Cohen

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6 Things for the Past 2 Days- Planned Parenthood, Petey. and a Dream Realized

1. Planned Parenthood will be offering counseling and birth control online- Bless you and amen. This is a big victory, because if women need non-judgemental help, nothing should stop us from helping them. I say this as a feminist and a Christian. Women have the right to make their choices, and to make choices that are different from what I would make. My only job is to love them, and to me, that means making sure they can get whatever help they need. Any way that Planned Parenthood can get around these nasty people who try to deny women, health, help, and choices is alright with me.

2. Getting my blood taken 4 times without passing out- I was pumped about it. I am also grateful I got to sort of share my medical morning with my Aunt Ann, because nothing puts your own temporary inconvenience into perspective like comparing it to the total courage and badassery needed to do chemo. Not to mention patience. Again and again for 2 yearsI am all proud of myself for a few little pricks while she faces down hours of her chemo treatment. That woman is amazing.

3. That having it all together time that will never come- This is being a parent right? Never getting things off your list? Hopefully this weekend will bring things back into a more timely place. I apologize to loyal readers.

4.  That this boy is 7- How did this happen? Lots of people are mourning on September 11th, but it is also a big day of celebration for us. Basically, one of my favorite people in the universe was born and I am so glad that I get to be his Aunt. 7 freaks me out, because toddler sweetness is gone and you are really just a kid. But Petey is still a sweetie and hilarious.And committed to Minecraft.

5. This- I have hated the whole nude picture debacle, and I kind of wanted to just ignore it completely because giving some disgusting pervert/ criminal the attention he is working for felt counterproductive.

6. "The recovery is a dream realized"- This is one of my favorite speeches about it, still. I hope everyone had a good day of service yesterday and can keep the spirit of that day going in the upcoming weeks.

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This- Jon Stewart 9-11

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Today's Inspiration- Trying to Sell Hyperrealism to my Brother

Chuck Close, Mark, 1979 from www.pacegallery.com

I spent part of my woozy, lazy afternoon trying to pitch hyperrealism to my brother, which is not my favorite artistic style, but it really made me think of how much intellectual nuance there is there in a world of technology and photography. Also, you don't think of Chuck Close and Van Eyck in the same breathe often, but it is fun to pitch them together as another mode of human connection. I don't think he bought it, but alas I enjoyed thinking about it anyway.

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